Jesus Christ this is why I love the 70s:

They're bad, they're mad, they're up front (but never out of sight)...

"There is no mistaking they are men's penis," says M. Cleaver... "The pants that men wear now will be looked upon as girls' pants after my models are sold."

This would put any contemporary ad copywriter to shame. I'm looking at you, users of the term "sizzling summer swimwear."