LMAO
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Me: How do I look? Mom: You look like a biker with herpes. Go change.
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Me: I swear, if I get a good grade on this test, I'm gonna s**t myself Mom: Well, thats a little...
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Me: I had a nice dream last night. Mom: Really? What was it about? Me: Can't remember, all I kn...
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Mom: WHAT?!?! I CANT HEAR YOU! IT'S TOO DARK IN HERE!
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Dad, on how warm we keep the house: Firewood doesn't grow on trees!
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Mom: Make sure you have sex BEFORE you get married. Preferably with more than one guy. Me: But I...
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me: how are you going to cut that tree that fell on the pond? Dad: wait till it freezes.. i aint...
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I dye my hair odd colors to express my indivuality, just like everyone else.
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I'm so emo and alone that I have my friends take pictures of me on swing sets looking emo and alone.
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Chicks are so lucky, they dont have to cut to bleed
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