It turns out that the idiot that brought a knife to a gun fight had an ancestor who was a drummer
Wish I'd brought my musket with me now. I have a feeling "parr-rum-pa-pum-pum" just isn't going to cut it!
Wait, everybody, stop! Time out! We need to clean up that broken glass before somebody cuts himself!
Whoa, A guy could get hurt out here. I'm going to make like a drum and beat it.