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Heartwarming Tearjerker: Family Heal After Son's Death With The Help Of His Dog

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    The story starts when the girlfriend wrote in to Reddit...

    Font - To get you up to speed: My boyfriend was killed in a car accident last month. This post is not about that. I am going to grief counseling and coping as well as I think I can at the moment. We were together for three years. We started living together a little over а year ago.

    Wow, what a horrible thing to suffer through, our hearts goes out to this woman and also to the family of her boyfriend, they must be going through quite a lot. The young man was also in his 20s which makes the loss even more devastating. You can skip this part if you want to get to the happy section of the story. 

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    Font - Prior to meeting Boyfriend, he got a ridiculously cute puppy. At the time, he was still living at home as his parents lived close to our university. However, this puppy was HIS puppy. She slept in his room, he took care of her and trained her. However, his mom loves Dog, and doted on her like a grandmother.

    Awww, here at I Can Has Cheezburger we certainly love puppies. Old dogs, young dogs, all different kinds of dogs make the world go round, that's for sure. 

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    Font - Boyfriend and I met in a local park because he had a puppy and I had an old grouchy dog of similar breed. (Adorbs, right?) We quickly started spending a good chunk of time with each other. I'd say we spent a good 60% of the week together. And by together, I mean me, boyfriend, my grouchy dog, and his young pup. Dog spent a lot of time at my place, and I helped with training, general care and dog activities.
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    Font - After we moved in with each other, I took on a lot more of the dog responsibilities. Boyfriend ended up getting a job with a long commute and a lot of overtime. I was okay with this, as I ended up putting my old dog down a couple months ago and I enjoyed having a dog to take care of again. I even started therapy dog training with her, because she has such an awesome temperament. All in all, we were a happy loving family, and Dog and I were great friends.
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    Font - After his death, his family came over to help sort through all his things. His family took the majority of his material things (car, computers, etc.), which I was okay with. I kept the sentimental things and joint purchases. I thought that was that.
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    The girlfriend learned that the family wanted to keep the dog, but she had been planning to keep it.

    Font - Last night, his mom popped by after work for a surprise visit. I thought she was just checking in with me or looking for support. After a few minutes of chit chat, she simply said, "Well, now that it seems like everything is settled, I've came to take Dog home."
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    Font - I was confused, and asked her what she meant. She explained that since Dog belonged to Boyfriend, it makes sense that Dog be returned to his family. At this point, I became visibly upset, and Mom backed off. She said I can say my goodbyes, but she will be by this weekend to pick up Dog.
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    Font - I am terrified guys. I don't want to lose Dog. She is a wonderful pet, but she is wonderful because Boyfriend spent so much time loving her, training her, and spending time with her. I recognize his mom is also in pain. I recognize that his mom always has loved this dog. I recognize his mom has also lived with and spent a lot of time with this dog. I understand why she wants the dog. But I don't want her to have my dog.
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    Font - Legally, I realize I don't have much of a leg to stand on. Boyfriend and I weren't married, we only been living together for a year, there was no will, and technically, Dog was Boyfriend's property. And property is transferred to the deceased's family. Right? If his family chose to take this to court, they have the resources to fight this. I don't.
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    Font - (Afternote: I just want to say his mom is NOT a bad person. She has always been polite, sweet and caring. His whole family is a bit rigid, and can be stubborn, but overall, I don't think they are malicious. I recognize why she wants the dog. It's the same reasons why I want the dog. Which I guess makes this even more difficult.)
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    Redditors helped to advise the woman on how to mediate the conflict and make it easier for everyone involved.

    Font - zoibac I would email / text the mom if you can. Let the mother know you understand why she wants the dog, but you "don't know if you can handle her being taken from you too right now." Maybe she just isn't seeing your perspective through her own grief, but my heart goes out to you. This is absolutely devastating, and I really hope there's a way for you to keep Dog without causing too much drama.
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    Font - Thanks for the reply. Just writing out the Reddit post helped me sort out some of my feelings. At first I was just outraged that she would ask for Dog. But after writing this out, I realized she was just coming from the same place I am.
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    Font - Right now, I am trying to work through the possibility of giving up Dog. It terrifies me, as I see her as family, but at the same time, I understand that is just how life works sometimes. It's not very fair, sometimes.
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    Font - zoibac Even better, maybe even write your feelings down in a letter and hand it to her personally before the weekend to really communicate that you've put some thought into it and that taking care of this dog is such a comfort to you.
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    After talking it out, the woman decided to give her boyfriend's dog to his family. It was a very selfless action on her part that involved a lot of kindness.

    Font - The Update Summarized: I no longer have Dog. She went to her new home on Thursday, so it took me a couple of days to process this next oh-so- awesome new change in my life. I am trying to talk myself through it, and am trying to feel all noble and shit. I figure an inflated, martyr-like ego is better than being a sad, jaded and bitter bitchface.. ohkay. I admit it. I am feeling more bitter than noble right now.
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    Font - The Details for those Interested: Last Friday, I ended up calling my boyfriend's Dad. We always got along pretty fabulously, and he is the one really holding the family together right now. He gave me a good update on the family, and the gist I got was Mom was in a pretty bad place. We decided to hold a family meeting about Dog.
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    Font - On Saturday, Mom, Dad, boyfriend's Sister and me got together and discussed what Dog meant to us. Naturally, Mom and I had some very similar outlooks, though I emphasized how Dog was a part of my family, my adventure buddy, and now my best friend now that Boyfriend was gone. Mom said she never realized I was that involved with Dog, and apologized for surprising me on Thursday. Both Mom and I got pretty weepy, and she excused herself to think things over.
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    Font - I told him that I would be ecstatic if I could keep Dog, as she is my world now, but I understood if Dog had a bigger purpose right now next to Mom's side. (OHKAY. That was a big, fat lie. I don't understand because I am selfish and believe that Dog belongs with me. But I am trying to be fucking noble here, okay?) Dad thanked me and we hugged. He told me that he and Mom will do some research for the next couple of days and think it over.
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    Font - Dad called me up on Tuesday. He told me Mom was insistent on having Dog, no matter what. He didn't sound too happy, and was very apologetic. He told me that he didn't know if this is the right decision, and he honestly felt that Dog belonged with me, but Mom wasn't moving on the subject. He timidly asked what I wanted to do.
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    Font - Also, I just want to say Mom isn't a bad person. She has always been sweet, and the death of her son devastated her. Okay, sure, I am sorta kinda just maybe angry at how the situation evolved. But I can't dispute the fact that she loves Dog. She saw Dog grow up, doted on Dog, and it is her granddog, so to speak. So part of me knows where she is coming from. I guess I just wanted to make sure people don't think she is a horrible person.
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    Font - MsQuince You keep putting yourself down for wanting to keep Dog, but I think doing an incredibly kind act despite those feelings makes it an even more selfless thing to do. I know it sucks right now. It might suck for quite a while, but you're going to be okay. P.S. Maybe this is your chance to adopt a new puppy? You sound like a fantastic and caring owner.
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    Here's where the story gets a bit more uplifting: the dog now lives with the boyfriend's family and he has really transformed the family's life for the better.

    Font - Hi Reddit! Ohkay, I figured since everyone was so nice and supportive on my last few posts, you guys deserve an update on the situation. (Post 1) (Post 2)
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    Font - Now for the good news: Last week, I ended up visiting Dog. She was ecstatic and so excited she might've peed herself a little bit. She looks healthy and happy, and that is what really counts. But, the best thing is what Dog did. For my boyfriend's father.
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    Font - Dad probably lost a good 30 lbs. since I last saw him when they came to take Dog away from me. He was excited to tell me all the things he has been doing with Dog. He took up bicycling, and then running, to try to keep Dog well exercised. He and Mom take walks with her in the evening, and began hiking on weekends. Dad sheepishly mentioned that Mom lost some weight as well, and they are both aiming to be healthier this year.
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    Font - You could tell Dad just doted on Dog. He said that since she was a herding dog, he began taking her to a local farm that trains sheepdogs, but then it turned out she was scared of sheep, so that was that. So now they are trying out agility because he read that border collies are good at agility. I realized he must've read all the resources I gave him on border collies and trying his best to keep Dog happy. He excitedly showed me Dog's Therapy Dog Certification and talked about how they go
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    After such a difficult year, it's wonderful to hear that the dog is helping the family to recover!

    Font - So that is where I am now. I am starting a new life, and still struggling to take regularly scheduled showers. Dog is doing well with her new home, and she really has brought new hope into Dad's and Mom's lives. I think- no, I know- that I made a great decision for sending Dog to live with Mom and Dad. You guys were right. I am strong and young enough (and it helps that I have wonderful friends) that I think I won't sleep or stink away to death. And Dog has gone off to do amazing things a

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