And that's the story of how the cable guy asked me out

Never assume your younger brother doesn't look at porn when he's using your computer. Do NOT expect him to be smart enough to clear the browsing history after. Do NOT believe it is safe to call a Time Warner repair technician to come switch out an old modem. Because your Top Sites WILL show a porno entitled "Getting F***ed by the Cable Guy", he WILL think this was on purpose, and he WILL look up at you & smile. With something green stuck between his teeth. #LFMF