If the man who's touch turned objects into gold fapped, what would happen?

‘Either move or I’ll move you': Woman on flight demands passenger give up his seat after learning the airline double-booked the spot, leading to a dispute when flight attendant steps in 1

Sister evicts brother's family from their family home, wonders if she's wrong: 'Last week him and his family were officially evicted' 2

'We can't let our dog outside if we're not on break': Boss demands work-from-home employees text him every time they leave their desks, inspires malicious compliance solutions 3

'He wanted to see every line of code in this project': Company CTO accuses freelancer of "faking" project results 4

32 of the Funniest Felines on the Internet and Meowrvelous Memes to Claw Your Way to a Purrfectly Wonderful Weekend 5

‘Let’s save our time and end this interview': Job candidate walks out of interview after being grilled by interviewer who undermined their experience for the job and demanded they up their game 6

Toez 1

And accurate 2

Ew humans 3

A Catalog of 28 Memes to Browse Through While Pretending to Work 4

Fill'r up or else... 5

No squirrels 6