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Guy Gets a Text from Random Number and the Conversation That Ensues Is Full-Blown Madness

Just want to give mad props here to all parties involved for dragging this conversation between two unlikely strangers out. Can't say that I saw it going where it did after an innocent enough, 'Hey'.

Posted by mattstaff
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  • 1
    Text - oo Virgin e 38% 12:47 AM <Вack Details iMessage Yesterday 9:06 PM Неу Hi What's up) Nothing, just been at work all day. Still here Nice. When do you think you'll get out?;)
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  • 2
    Text - Oh, probably like 30 minutes ;) You out? Heellll yeeaaahhhh Doin coke? You should come over Oh shit, yeah, why not
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  • 3
    Text - It's time to suck your dick What's your address again? Avenue 140 l'll be home in 24 Min 15 min actually just left the bar Are you gonna come?
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  • 4
    Text - Word I'll bring a pack of Totino's pizza rolls Yass Waiting outside I'm at tops now - be there in 5 Should I pick anything up while I'm here? Astroglide? Lol
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  • 5
    Text - There's a sale on hummus How 'bout it? If you're gonna dip pizza rolls in it then go ahead haha Ok.Be there soon Lol I just remembered that I can't eat pizza rolls WHY?
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  • 6
    Text - I started a ketogenic diet today. I'll make them for you tho lol Text when you're here Oh damn! I got some Oysters tho?! I can eat oysters haha Oh shit, my car's on E right now. Gotta swing home for some gas in my shed. Spent my last $'s on these Totino's. Be there real soon - don't fall asleep ;)
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  • 7
    Text - Оkayyyyууу Do you need any gas?? I don't need any gas I need your dock Dick So hurry Hurrying All aboard! Toot tooooot!
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  • 8
    Text - Lol how fucked up you Alright omw for real Really close How close lol 5 minutes How drunk are you lul 07 Lol
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  • 9
    Text - I can't wait to make out with you How much time so we have? На Do*
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  • 10
    Text - As much as you want I have to be at work at 8 but whatever Damn, I ran out of gas- refilling now You already told me you ran out of gas.... No, it was on E, I brought the jug with me, cuz I was too lazy to do it right away lol
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  • 11
    Text - Haha okay So how much longer free Longerrrr* 5 more minutes My black car is pulled all the way up in the driveway. There's nothing behind it. Still park on the street. Yeah no prob Did you preheat the oven??
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  • 12
    Text - To what Can't they be cooked in the microwave Imfao You can.....but you're not gonna get that crunch... Get here lol Preheat to 350. Optimal crunch is at 375. Falling asleep... I didn't want to say this...
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  • 13
    Text - How much longer the oven is preheated I changed my mind. ))): Nooo 400. Omg For real tho are you almost here? My phone is about to die
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  • 14
    Text - Are you mad? I'm sorry No lol Just waiting for you to get here since you said "5 min" 15 min ago Just a hamster struggling with a spaghetti noodle.
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  • 15
    Text - Can't wait to get those Totino's Pizza Rolls in me ;) CRUNCH Please tell me you're almost here Jk, I had to wake my mom up to give me ride. Be there in 5. Alright. Obviously you're not coming.
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  • 16
    Text - :/ I'm gonna go to bed now Sorry it was so bad last time that you had to play games with me Hope i was a good source of entertainment for you and your friends Sorry, this is legitimately the wrong number. You should probably contact the person you meant to contact in the first place.
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  • 17
    Cat - At least you like pizza rolls Hang in there. На
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  • 18
    Text - Do we knoweach other tho?? Turn off your oven Read 12:25 AM iMessage
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