7 Ways To Be A Better Dater And Leave Failed Talking Stages In The Past

• Save the drama for your Mama

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  Seriously. Do not drag your baggage into the relationship unless you feel such a keen connection that you can swear is reciprocated, hold off on telling him about your daddy issues. Or that doll collection you've been hoarding since adolescence. Or how you've befriended all your ex's girlfriends to keep tabs on him and you'll probably do the same to him if he chooses to dump you.

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• Neediness is the worst

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  The neediness you have for a new guy, (but try to hide and miserably fail at), is the hardest thing to avoid. The onslaught of early attachment to someone you barely know is something I'm sure we're all familiar with. Now, we can argue pragmatism all we want but science plays a huge role in why we are like this. All to surmise: it's normal, but is it cute? Sexy? A turn-on? Hell no. So, you need to just lock it down, my friend. To quote Rachel Green, "This is a very critical time right now. If you feel yourself reaching for that phone, then you go shoe shopping, you get your butt in a bubble bath."

• Bawse it Up!

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  Now is the perfect time to start that side hustle you've been putting off for the longest time. You know what I'm talking about. Those terra-cotta paintings aren't going to paint themselves. Your plant mom business is waiting to thrive! That novella you've put off writing is screaming for your attention. Tend to these little dreams instead of your throbbing ego.

• Don't Watch Rom Coms

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  Just don't—avoid them at all cost. Don't even walk past a movie theater if that's what it takes. Okay, okay…I'll allow you to watch the indie romantic films. You know the ones I'm talking about; shotty cinematography and heartbreaking plotlines to better place your mind in a realistic setting. 

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• Do Your Homework

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  Study the successful relationships in your life. This can mean other couples you know who are content with each other. It can mean the relationships you've built with your closest friends. This is the time to ask yourself: Why are these bonds long-lasting? Is it common ground shared? Is it impulsive trips taken together? What's the one thing that makes all these connections work seamlessly? 

• What’s Your WHY?

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  Remember why you chose to date him in the first place. And your answer can't be his perfect torso. Nor can it be his golden retriever or streaming service subscription. Maybe this guy seems like Mr. Right because he took genuine interest in your work and he doesn't only seem like a family man, but offers concrete evidence to prove he may just be that as well. Ask your "why" and go from there. 

• Be Honest with Yourself

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  If he's secretly hard to get because you just KNOW he's meeting three other girls that week and you're holding out hope for someone unrealistic, then dump him. Unless you want to be in a continuous loop of "Does he even like me?", I suggest going your separate ways now. And if it's only fun you want, then indulge responsibly. Just don't be an innocent sucker for a pretty face—especially if it will come at the price of your own time and sanity.

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