Update: 16-year-old discovers that her father has taken $300 cash from her savings jar on top of the rising rent that he has been charging her, her boss agrees to help her: 'He said that since I’m his daughter, he’s entitled to the money I make'

It's important for kids and teens to contribute more to the household as they get older, be it through chores or taking more responsibility for themselves. Not only does this ease some burden off the responsibility of their parents who have spent the last dozen or more years running themselves ragged chasing kids around, but it helps teach the teens responsibility and other essential skills they're going to need in their future lives.

When they're old enough 15 or 16 you might try to have them learn another lesson: working. While it might seem fair to spare them for as long as possible, given they're going to be working for the rest of their lives, it actually helps a great deal in helping shape a young person into a functioning adult. And, oh, trust me when it comes to hiring for any job down the line you can tell the difference, both in interviews and how they conduct themselves in the workplace between someone who has worked at least a part time job since they were younger versus looking for a job for the first time after graduation.

Plus, they'll get to experience the freedom that comes with having your own income. I'll never forget the feeling I had when I got my first paycheck; I ran straight to the nearest Oakley sunglasses store and spent a large portion of it on some sunglasses that looked like some alien had dropped them out of a UFO. While it's important also to learn the importance of saving and not spending money on frivolous purchase, we all have to start somewhere.

Like what you see? Follow our WhatsApp channel for more.

Author image for Brad Dickson Brad Dickson
Advertisement
  • A woman holds a jar of money
    via Kateryna Hliznitsova For Unsplash+

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • Advertisement

  • Your parents will encourage you to do this, and I recall my parents trying a great deal to get me to save a certain amount of my summer earnings. But, having your parents actually dip their fingers into your funds feels backwards. Parents are supposed to provide for their children, not the other way around. Certainly, taking something that is yours without asking is wrong too, especially when parents are the ones who are supposed to be teaching you that lesson.

  • "Last year in November, I began working at a restaurant as a hostess to save up for a car."

    For some background, I (16F) have lived with my dad (64M) for about a year now. My parents are divorced and I am not close with my mother. I'm going into my senior year (I'm graduating a year early) and start school again in a week or so. Last year in November, I began working at a restaurant as a hostess to save up for a car. I take the bus to and from school, as well as to work, and a car would save me a lot of time. I make minimum wage, and I pull in a little over 1,000 dollars a month after
    via Exciting-Classic-812

  • This 16-year-old has been working as a restaurant hostess, a job she took on in order to save for her first car. She soon found, though, that she wasn't earning as much as she was expecting, as she found herself consistently and increasingly financially drained by her father's demands that she put that money towards paying for her own phone bill and other costs of living, like utilities. Now, that might sound a little strange for a parent to ask, except in situations of extreme financial hardship, but it didn't stop there. It soon escalated, with her father demanding that she pay for a portion of the family's rent as well, and then, to her returning home one day to find that roughly $300 in cash had been taken from her room. When she confronted her father, he told her that since she was his daughter, he could take whatever he liked from her. Fed up with all of this, she told her father that she was just going to quit her job instead; she wasn't making any money, so what was the point? 

    It sounds like a really difficult situation overall, and this parent needs to seriously take a look at themselves and their approach to parenting.

  • In February of this year, my dad told me since I was making so much money. I needed to start contributing to the household. At first this was fine. He asked that I pay for my phone bill and utilities. We rent from a family member so utilities are discounted, and my phone bill isn't too expensive either. Both things are about $200. With this I was saving less so I still had spending. money, but still had set aside 4-500 dollars every month for the car.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • In July he decided I needed to pay a portion of the rent. I tried to argue with him on that but he threatened to close my account (which he can do because he opened it for me). I had to start giving him 500 dollars on top of the 200 a month, totaling 700 a month. With the 300 I had left I saved 200 for the car and kept 100.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Advertisement
  • A woman counts a jar of money with $100 bills on the table
    via Kateryna Hliznitsova For Unsplash+

    Image is representative only and does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • I was pretty fed up at this point, but it gets worse. I have some cash in a jar in my room, in case I go do something that you can't use a card for. I had about 300 dollars in the jar from several months. Last week I came home from work and the jar is empty. When I asked my dad he said that since I'm his daughter he's entitled to the money I make. I was furious. I told. him he had to give it back but he had already spent it on some BS Amazon purchases. Lucky me. He told me he wanted 100 extra do
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Last night I told my dad I was going to give my two weeks notice. I work hard. and I'm exhausted, it isn't worth the few hundred dollars I get. He was absolutely furious and said that I owe it to him to contribute to the household. I go to work in a few hours and I'm planning on letting them know I won't be continuing. So, AITAH? TDLR: My dad takes the majority of my salary for himself, and working is no longer worth it, so I'm quitting my job
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Advertisement
  • Update: First of all thank you to everyone who responded and gave advice. I did not expect this to get so many upvotes and comments, I expected like 50 tops so just... wow. I posted this on a Thursday and went to work that day as usual. I decided against my better judgement not to tell my boss anything. The restaurant I work at is a little family owned small business and I'm pretty close with my boss, the owner. Shes kind of like an auntie and she's a family friend (how I got the job at 15). On
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • which she agreed to. Someone suggested asking if I could get my checks in cash, so I asked her about that and she said yes! I have my cash hidden in a locked box my dad doesn't know the combo to and I will probably continue keeping it in there. My dad would have to close the account I currently have, so it's open for now. My dad is out of the state until Monday so I'm home alone for now and have time to make sure all my cash and stuff is out of his reach.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Interesting-Long-534 NTA. Do you have another trusted relative who will help you open a bank account?
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Advertisement
  • Menace_78 Not at 16 you don't. He's legally obligated to support you, not vice versa. Where did you live before? Can you ask your mom to help you open a different bank account that he does not have access to? | would caution against quitting your job because it does give you some independence. I would try to find a different way to save outside of his control. I am REALLY sorry you are going through this.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Sparklingwine23 NTA, he won a stupid prize for playing a stupid game.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Garden DivaESQ Quit your job and make sure you're getting good grades. Tell dad you need to get into college so you're not going to work. You may want to take out funds in $100 bills so that he can't use your money. The day you turn 18, take your birth certificate to the bank and get an account of your own. At a different bank than he uses. Go to college and you won't need a car.
    via Exciting-Classic-812
  • Advertisement

Stay up to date by following us on Facebook!

Tags

family dynamics teens family drama aita AITAH kids teenagers siblings reddit story family feud parenting etiquette dad family reddit thread parent raising kids Parenting Fail parents children
Scroll Down For The Next Article

Also From FAIL Blog

20+ Landlords who refused to solve their tenants' household issues: 'My landlord said, "Just don't use the light switch"'

20+ Landlords who refused to solve their tenants' household issues: 'My landlord said, "Just don't use the light switch"'

Trending Now

'Approve my 1-week PTO or accept my 2-week notice': Boss denies IT employee's vacation request until he trains the new hire on a decade worth of experience, employee refuses and submits his resignation instead

'Approve my 1-week PTO or accept my 2-week notice': Boss denies IT employee's vacation request until he trains the new hire on a decade worth of experience, employee refuses and submits his resignation instead

01
Boss schedules employee to work during their vacation, threatens to fire them if they don't come in and hires someone to replace them: 'Turns out while I was gone he tried to replace me with someone who quit after 2 days'

Boss schedules employee to work during their vacation, threatens to fire them if they don't come in and hires someone to replace them: 'Turns out while I was gone he tried to replace me with someone who quit after 2 days'

02
‘I learned my lesson': 19-year-old night janitor agrees to take on boss's work during summer break, immediately regrets it after discovering they won't get compensated for the extra work

‘I learned my lesson': 19-year-old night janitor agrees to take on boss's work during summer break, immediately regrets it after discovering they won't get compensated for the extra work

03
7-year-old brother refuses to move bicycle out of passageway after his older sibling insists, so his sibling disassembles it and packs it away for him instead: 'I spent 30 minutes taking apart his bike'

7-year-old brother refuses to move bicycle out of passageway after his older sibling insists, so his sibling disassembles it and packs it away for him instead: 'I spent 30 minutes taking apart his bike'

04
23-year-old employee demands that 24-year-old coworker pays for her parking ticket because she said they could park there: 'She was lying!'

23-year-old employee demands that 24-year-old coworker pays for her parking ticket because she said they could park there: 'She was lying!'

05
UPDATE: 'I chose to leave. I gave his ring back and told him we’re done': 27-year-old calls off engagement after her fiancé insists on buying a remote cottage 3 hours away from her job, risking her career

UPDATE: 'I chose to leave. I gave his ring back and told him we’re done': 27-year-old calls off engagement after her fiancé insists on buying a remote cottage 3 hours away from her job, risking her career

06
Advertisement