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50 Funny Tumblr Posts That'll Help You Waste Your Time

There's nowhere on the internet like Tumblr. Where else would you find shitposts, niche jokes and the dankest of memes to waste your day? Being productive is well and good, but have you ever spent a whole day looking at funny Tumblr posts? We highly recommend it. It is a bizarre treasure trove of delights and there are plenty of Tumblr posts to go around. Let those emails wait till later, and settle down for the best part of the day: Tumblr time. 

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  • 1
    funny tumblr - Adaptation - spell-bound-life Crystals for banishing someone: Any of em if you throw em hard enough morticious-delicious LEY This here's my banishin' rock.
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  • 2
    funny tumblr - Text - bogleech Don't feel bad if you're sensitive to negative feedback because apparently after one particular bad review Hans Christian Andersen found just sobbing while lying face down in the dirt Source: bogleech #me 262,205 notes
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  • 3
    funny tumblr - Text - pleatherghost you can deal so much damage by just switching articles. "Im so hungry, i could eat the horse." one-hit k.o. pleatherghost don't look the gift horse in a mouth pleatherghost you can also add horses to other idioms, such as, "don't count your horses before they hatch." you can do this in any number of ways pleatherghost furryfricker69 #now lie in it #you opened this can of horses this is the most powerful addition to this i've seen. thanks, furry fricker 69
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  • 4
    Funny Tumblr rants about cowboys are witches are horses are their familiars and guns are magic wants what only know one spell, bullets
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  • 5
    funny tumblr - Text - m00nqueer ok this is "earring magic ken" who was introduced in 1992 (and discontinued shortly thereafter) basically mattel had done a survey and discovered that girls didn't think ken was "cool" enough SO someone had the bright idea to research coolness by sending people to raves which, at the time, were mostly hosted & attended by gay men. so they went to these raves and took notes on what the fashions were and finally landed on this outfit, mesh shirt & all this doll beca
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  • 6
    funny tumblr - Text - silverhawk i had a dream last night that mothman was getting sued by the state of west virginia for accidentally breaking light posts and he hired me as his lawyer and in court i was like "now my client is a giant moth so you cant blame him for loving lights" and halfway through my speech i turned to address mothman and saw he was bumping into the courtroom lights and they broke and caused a power outage
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  • 7
    funny tumblr - Text - ceeblathers my brother is sitting in the chair in my room studying a practice test thing for his final test before he becomes a fully certified EMT tomorrow and he's mumbling some of the questions out loud and he just went "a child has fallen from a monkey at school..." and he just got dead quiet and stared at the wall for like a solid minute with the most stricken look on his face before he whispered "there's no protocol for monkeys" bro bro it means monkey bars ceeblather
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  • 8
    funny tumblr - Text - my friends who have dogs: this is my beautiful son he is not very smart but hes such a good kind boy my friends who have cats: this is my terrible daughter she is very soft and has tiny beans my friends who have birds: this is the wretched foul gremlin who lives in my house and Screams very loud. i love her
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  • 9
    funny tumblr about feeling the most beautiful when a dog tugs on owners leash because he wants to come say hi to me
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  • 10
    Tumblr meme of someone from 1904 that looks like he is having fun with interesting story behind the picture
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  • 11
    tumblr rant about the with from hansel and gretel
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  • 12
    Tumblr exchange highlighting the differences between winter games and summer games at the Olympics
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  • 13
    ad screenshot of hard to meet significant other early on
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  • 14
    funny tumblr post about mentally crucifying a cat because of being brainwashed by catholic school
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  • 15
    Tumblr conversation about how the Church is very goth aesthetically speaking
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  • 16
    tumblr internal monologue about self discipline
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  • 17
    tumblr conversation about how cows would wear glasses
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  • 18
    writing prompt tumblr exchange about bounty hunter in search of past life debts
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  • 19
    The Universe and Humans Tumblr dialogue with human's wanting to go faster and faster
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  • 20
    cutlery meme on tumblr
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  • 21
    tumblr dialogue about how ADHD and autism aren't new diseases, it's just they would go undiagnosed
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  • 22
    wholesome tumblr rant of woman who connected with an autistic girl at kindergarten
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  • 23
    tumblr joke about writing on a resume that you're a mentally healthy person who loves capitalism
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  • 24
    Tumblr conversation about how crazy it is that horses and moose are prey animals and they ask if you'd rather they are predators
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  • 25
    Funny tumblr conversation of female birds that prefer a certain color band on male birds and how it can mess up science results and populations and a girl chimes in that that humans are similar
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  • 26
    cursed amulet tumblr and 4chan meme
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  • 27
    bird presentation on Tumblr
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  • 28
    crude cartoon on Tumblr of airplane bouncing of the water with boeing sound
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  • 29
    tumblr shark webcomic
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  • 30
    tumblr posts about second-hand embarrassment and how to get rid of such empathy
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  • 31
    tumblr meme about pressure and peer pressure under the sea
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  • 32
    tumblr PSA about the Baltic sea looking like an alligator
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  • 33
    funny tumblr - Erinaceidae - if you've been having a bad day here's a hedgehog with a strawberry on its head even if you haven't been having a bad day here's something to make your day better 329,135 notes PURCHASE FINANCING FOR UP TO 60 MON onss tohouse
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  • 34
    funny tumblr - Text - The economy's biggest mystery paychecks just aren't growing The 228000 jobs created formed a solid foundation, but the moribund 2.5 percent wage growth left many scratch... CNBC 18 hours ago wagecucks Oh boy!! It's a fucking mystery?? A spooky scary mystery!! Better get fucking Sherlock Holmes on this one! It's a big fucking mystery, with no obvious answer! robstmartin This is not a Sherlock Holmes mystery. This is a Scooby-Doo mystery, where the villain is an old white guy
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  • 35
    funny tumblr - Text - beyoncepatronus me: *about to sleep* my brain: the only reason you perceive yourself as a relatively mellow and laid back person is because you are completely engrossed by your daydreams, and constantly focus on those instead of your real life and the consequences of your actions and decisions. evidence shows that when you are forced to confront real life problems, you quickly resort to panicking. in addition to- me: can't we drag me in the morning Source: beyoncepatronus
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  • 36
    funny tumblr - Text - just-shower-thoughts Contractions function almost identically to the full two-word phrase, but are only appro- priate in some places in a sentence. It's one of the weird quirks of this language we've. thechubbynerd This post needs some kind of warning sign. ae allthingslinguistic That's the kind of linguist I'm. Source: just-shower-thoughts
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  • 37
    funny tumblr - Font - punlich Depression Tips Kill the gods and eat their flesh to rise above human chemicals into horrifying immortality
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  • 38
    funny tumblr - Text - sharingwritingprompts A huge and ancient dragon loses her clutch of eggs. She decides to adopt an office building full of employees as her children. But to keep them safe, she doesn't want to let any of them leave. agender-plant "Mighty Opiess, Destroyer of Kingdoms, pl-" "Mom." "Uhh....right. Mom. Um, so I have to get back home. I've got three kids who need dinner and I really think I should..go....back..why are you crying?" "Grandbabies!!" shapeshiftinterest her business
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  • 39
    funny tumblr - Text - darkvioletcloud im going through my skyrim screenshot folder 40 Do you want to poison the delicious quinoa, susan? 459 30 148 Yes No 36 179 90 18 han-j1 Who names their character Susan darkvioletcloud I'm poisoning an enchanted crossbow, which I gave a nickname to so I wouldn't accidentally sell it. The name of the weapon is "delicious quinoa, Susan"
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  • 40
    funny tumblr - Text - filledwiththislight Things my dentist has actually said to me: "Well, either the x-rays lied to me or you are spontaneously creating teeth. I'm going with the second one because it's way cooler. "When was the last time you flossed? Your gums aren't bleeding which means I'm either not doing this hard enough or you actually floss your teeth regularly" "You don't need to do a fiuoride treatment I just want to go check my facebook for a second and this is the best excuseI can c
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  • 41
    funny tumblr - Text - anime still don't really understand how some people have trouble just being nice the-fault-in-our-balls Oh my gosh you're such a good person. Hey everybody come look at how much of a good person this is. anime i literally cannot comprehend how you got offended by this but thanks for proving my point anyway
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  • 42
    funny tumblr - Bird - barysan i'll kick anyone's ass. i'll kick your ass. i'll kick your dog's ass. i'll kick my own ass
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  • 43
    funny tumblr - Text - dongboss i got my wisdom teeth removed today and igot home and wanted to watch how its made but i couldnt remember what it was called so this was my search history how to soft voice-YouTube www.youtube.com 1:58 PM 158 PM how nice voice -YouTube www.youtube.com how tonnice voice - YouTube www.youtube.com 1:58 PM how to make the thing calm voice- YouTube www.youtube.com 1:58 PM 1:57 PM make the thing nice voice - YouTube www.youtube.com HOW-YouTube www.youtube.com 1:57 PM hHO
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  • 44
    tumblr post about mexican samurai
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  • 45
    tumblr about google trying to find the servant boy
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  • 46
    tumblr post of dogs that ate bees
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  • 47
    tumblr ponders the bible for boys and what it's contents contain
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  • 48
    Tumblr rant about how Joan of Arc was burned at the stake at 19 but you've done nothing with your life
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  • 49
    Quilly Joel tumblr post about hedgehog at a mini piano
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  • 50
    Tumblr questionable quotation marks on ring bell for MEAT SERVICE sign
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