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17 Embarrassed Individuals Share Their Adult Versions Of Calling the Teacher "Mom"

Nobody's perfect. If you haven't done it already, it's pretty likely you're gonna try to open your front door with your car keys or tell your boss you love them. You're not alone. Everyone has those moments where your brain goes on autopilot. Even Tumblr had a discussion about it.

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    Text - edited 17 hours ago leeklais 8.7k points 1 day ago This happened to a coworker years and years ago. We were tellers at a local bank. Every Christmas we had tiny candy canes to give to the kids of customers. One guy came through with his. With his transactions he had cash back. Teller 1 was helping him. She proceeds to give him his cash in a 100 bill and the candy cane for his kid. He looks at her and says, "Can I have that broken up?" She then proceeds to bash the candy cane to a pulp wit
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    Text - benzodiazaqueen 713 points 1 day ago I referred to the pediatrician as "the veterinarian" for the first year or two of our kid's life. Even did it in the office and over the phone with staff. Yes, we had pets long, long before we had kids. Thankfully, they claimed to find it charming, and reported I wasn't the first to make the mistake.
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    Text - ilovejackiebot 20.6k points 1 day ago S On the way back from a client meeting with one of the partners, he wasn't paying attention when the light turned green and I said "Hey, babe, you gotta go." And then I died.
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    Text - Xavilend 2.7k points 1 day ago signing an email "Best Retards"
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    Text - edited 13 hours ago NetaFeta 1.0k points 1 day ago Accidentally threw my phone in the air and tried to catch it with my mouth, as one would do with a grape or something Showerhead sprayed water on the toilet bowl so I wiped it off with a reusable towel, proceeded to throw the towel in the toilet. Saw a cockroach on the ground when I was on the phone wearing only pants. Didn't step on it, no that would've been sane. I fucking crushed it with my palm. Thought to myself "well fuck, I got thi
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    Text - nathanweisser 12.2k points 1 day ago Well I've accidentally rubbed the back of some random chick at Walmart thinking she was my wife before
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    Text - gazzaskebab 53.1k points 1 day agoS I have accidentally said "love you" when hanging up on a work call.
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  • 8
    Text - Back2Bach 4.3k points 1 day ago When the priest says, "May the Lord light up your life!" And you reply, "And up yours!"
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    Text - sofia6664 14.9k points 1 day ago edited 1 hour ago My friend was on a toilet, someone knocked and she said:, Come in!
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    Text - SoapyRibnaut 44.4k points 1day ago I was given a lift home by a colleague from work once, and when he stopped to let me out of the car I leaned in for a kiss as it was what I would do to my wife. Thankfully he was looking the other way at the time.
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  • 11
    Text - edited 20 hours ago KnivesForward 27.1k points 1 day ago These days I rarely talk on the phone to anyone who isn't family so "love you, bye " is a standard phone call ending. We had some issues at our house last year and I'm pretty sure I told 2 contractors and the insurance adjuster I loved them.
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    Text - Kutzelberg 33.6k points 1 day ago Once I was in the airport and I went to get a sandwich. I stood at the counter to tell the worker to give me a turkey sandwich, which he prepared. He handed it to me and his co-worker noticed he didn't microwave it, so he extended his hand to me over those glass container thingies,which have food displayed in them, so he can take it to microwave it. I didn't understand why he was extending his hand so I smiled and shook it. He laughed and pointed at my fo
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    Text - Says ShowUsYourDick 2.7k points 1 day ago I'm one of those "never save numbers in my phone" kinda guys. When I was in the Army, I was stationed somewhere with a different area code than mine, and got to talking to a local girl. Things were getting heated one night over text, so we were sending raunchy things back and forth. I wasn't paying attention for a moment and sent a message to the wrong person by mistake. My sergeant replied, "Alright, I'm not really into all that, but make sure yo
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  • 14
    Text - Oocanada 30.7k points 1 day ago edited 22 hours ago Handed a 20 to the officer instead of my license last night
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    Text - mssDMA 13.8k points 1 day ago I'm a teacher. I unthinkingly scolded my dog the other day with, "Follow the directions!" We kinda just stared at each other for a second while I realized how ridiculous I sounded.
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    Text - ally12321 26.8k points 1 day ago At Dollar Tree the other day my boyfriend walked up to the cashier and she said almost immediately "How was your meal?" and then "Oh! wrong job!"
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  • 17
    Text - edited 22 hours ago, alison_bee 12.4k points 1 day ago I'm a dental hygienist. my patient was a man who had just turned 91 the day before. instead of saying "happy late birthday!" like a normal fucking human being, I accidentally (and very loudly) said "HAPPY LAST BIRTHDAY!!!" the look on his face... y'all this was also my second day at my new job.
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