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16 Entertaining Posts That'll Remind You That Tumblr Is The Best

We know there's been a mass exodus of Tumblr fans, but hear us out: its value did not lie in the area of porn! Instead, let us remember all the amazing jokes, shitposts, and unfortunate, terrible facts that kept us coming back for more.

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  • 1
    Text - just-shower-thoughts Because there are always pregnant people, the average number of skeletons in a body is higher than one pseudinymous never needed to think about this, but now I'm reblogging it and all of you can suffer as well. 54,656 notes
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  • 2
    Text - wordcubed Answer me this atheists If God never existed, then whose heavenly staircase did I march up, whose heavenly host did I best in battle, and whose severed head do I keep stowed in my basement? enye-word bruh that was your landlord
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  • 3
    Text - showerthoughtspost Maybe we don't hear as much about organized crime these days because they've gotten REALLY organized. dolphinfag666 sir you are referring to the government Source: showerthoughtspost
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  • 4
    Text - audrey-scorne oh so i'm a "gatekeeper" just because i own this gate and won't open it unless you bribe me or solve my riddles three? 90 385 notes A
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  • 5
    Text - just-shower-thoughts You can't spell advertisements without semen between the tits. ki-adi-money What in the fuck did I just read? clarknokent Not all heroes wear capes
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  • 6
    Text - you-only-liberate-once my host mom in Japan referred to her Roomba as "Roomba-san" and when it would get stuck she would just look over it and softly say "ganbatte, Roomba- san...ganbatte" as it made distressed beeping noises at her whoopsrobots "Ganbatte: Cheer up, Be courageous, Do your best" Source: you-only-liberate-once 151,556 notes
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  • 7
    Cartoon - bb bb BB BB Bb Bb Bb Bab B po B B Bb b ajanigoldmane One of my favorite things about biology is that there are so many diagrams like this that look like shitposts if you remove any and all context from them
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  • 8
    Text - ronibravo today my gf said "when donkey asks shrek what his name is, shrek pauses before he says shrek, and i'm convinced he came up with it on the spot." we weren't even talking about shrek. i can't stop thinking about it or about how lucky i am to be with her Source: ronibravo 48,569 notes
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  • 9
    Text - etrianprincess helpful grammar tip! farther is for physical distance, further is for metaphorical distance, and father is for emotional distance! Source: etrianprincess 10,577 notes
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  • 10
    Text - toastyhat of my favorite tropes is when your group of main characters has been split up for questioning and they're all answering the same questions in a neatly-spliced montage starfieldcanvas my favorite trope is when the stories blatantly and hilariously conflict
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  • 11
    Text - pokememoan ohh-whatsername: bekkaa: I use hun not hon because you are not my honey, you are my fierce warrior this was surprisingly uplifting Source: bekkaa 558,326 notes 11
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  • 12
    Text - frowningfoxbones A Blood Mage goblin, or a "Hemogoblin", if you will. tharook I will not.
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  • 13
    Text - barduils owning a cat makes you immune to demons barduils evil spirits in my house: *creak my door open ominously* me: is that you baby??? *kissing noises* come here sweet baby <3 barduils me: *feels another PresenceTM somewhere in the kitchen with me while i'm fetching glass of water at 3am* me, sleepy and unafraid: i'm not letting you out yet you bastard, go back to bed the yellow-eyed demon that stalks me in the dark: *whispering* damn it 476 notes
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  • 14
    Text - nicolerichiecirca2003 listen...i literally dream of being a woman with a skin care routine, that smells good always and eats vegetables but i am a swamp demon and i'm doing what i can with that
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  • 15
    Text - transhumanisticpanspermia the dopest thing about horses is that they're basically grass engines like, grass goes in, fast comes out most things that produce fast (like cheetahs, and cars) use much more heavily processed grass, like horses, and oil and yet here horses are, producing The Fast with only The Grass pairinstability Are you ok
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  • 16
    Text - hwgac obscuritiesoffbeat obscuritiesoffbeat I hate the fact that the sentence "mummies are rare because we ate them" is factual. somewhatsociable I'm sorry, what? obscuritiesoffbeat I am so happy to be the one to introduce you to the horrible few hundred years where Europeans regularly consumed ground Egyptian mummies. Source: obscuritiesoffbeat #nahariclipsqueue
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