Xamitlu has something to say...

I have to apologize. I have been absent from this site and the reason was because Xami was sad… like really sad… like 'Xami wanted to kill himself' sad. I suffer from depression and anxiety and it got the best of me one day and (for the fourth time) I was going to make a terrible, terrible mistake. Fortunately, I reached out to someone before I went through with it. I wasn't happy with my job and the amount of success I've accomplished so far, I wasn't happy with the people in my life, and all of this election stuff really got to me big time (I care too much I guess). I was just wallowing in my own self-pity and it pity that wasn't called for. It may not seem like a big deal at all but the pain was just too heavy for me to bear. I just didn't want to suffer or see anyone suffering anymore. A lot of what I was upset about was out of my control and apparently so was dealing with anxiety. I'm still a little shaking since I've left the hospital. But the time I spent there allowed me sit back and reanalyze everything and I realize now I do not want to leave this Earth, just yet. There are so many things I want to do before I die and one of those things was to goof around with my brony friends on this site! I feel a little ashamed to admit all of this but you never know what somepony is really going through under the surface. Depression and anxiety is no joke and even the strongest person can fail to conquer it. What I vow to do from this point is to be more vocal about how I'm feeling. And if any of you all don't mind, I would like to reach out to you when I feel like I need a pick me up. I encourage anyone else who may be going through a similar situation to do the same. I would be there for any of you. But, Xami is okay now.