Aevangeline

Mum: your cousin was born today. me: Aw, does she look like Auty K or Uncle G? Mum: She looks l...

Grandma: I can be a cheerleader! Come on boys! come on boys! Come and show me all your toys!

Dad: I want my tombstone to say 'He died by the fist.' Mom: What are you talking about? Dad: I ...

(Noticing a fly sitting on a dead fly) Mom: Look! A necrophiliac fly!

Mom: This is yogurt, and that is a praying mantis. Neither one is a turtle!

Mom: The pudding knows your secrets. It sees what you did there. Me: Mom, we don't have any pudd...

Mom: "No human sacrificies in the living room!"

Mom: "Thanks for telling me your brother was kidnapped. I was beginning to worry where he was."

Me: Do you want me to put your Snickers in the fridge? Grandma: What? Do you want me to put arse...

Me: Can I go rollerblading? Mom: Don't fall, don't die, and don't get hit by a bus. Me: Can I g...

(While examining a colorful rock she found:) Mom: This rock makes me want to fart.

Grandpa: Leave that alone, I'm growing a cheese tree.

Dad: I want my tombstone to say "Live by the fist; die by the fist!" Mom: What are you talking a...