Alfabet00789

While taking a break from my English project, my dad says (in a Russian accent): "Quit Stalin', ...

DAD: Hey dad, can I have some money to buy some coke? DAD: Sure! How much? ME: $1.65 DAD: Oh, ...

*Me opeing the fridge to get some food. I find an empty ham package* Me: Dad,why is there an emp...

Dad: (completely randomly) Have you ever just looked at someone and thought they should have been...

Dad: I'm so hungry I could eat a wh*re... Mom: You mean a horse? Dad: Where's the fun in that?

(my ex, who my mum was never a fan of, knocks on the front door) *Mum answers* Ex: Can I talk t...