The latest from Ginrikuzuma
The night you think its funny to put your only condom over your head to make your friends laugh will be the night you girlfriend wants to have sex for the first time. #LFMF
Just because it's the middle of the night, and just because it's a gas station in the middle of nowhere, don't leave the bathroom door unlocked. A stranger WILL walk into the bathroom just as you are attempting to insert a tampon. It's embarassing for the both of you. #LFMF
When your brother in law, is home on leave from Iraq, and is taking a nap, do not set off a string of firecrackers outside his bedroom. He will kick your ass. You will deserve it. #LFMF
When cooking your boyfriend dinner in a bra and panties and waiting for him to get home, make sure he isn't bringing home his parents. #LFMF
When subtly telling your girlfriend you'd rather have sex than eat dinner, the right phrasing is never, "Looking at you makes me lose my appetite".
When your boyfriend's mother is moving into the bedroom you've been using, make sure that the whip, chains and wrist cuffs aren't still in the dresser. #LFMF
When you're cuddling up with your girlfriend talking fondly about the time you first said "I love you," make sure you have the right story and you're not talking about your ex. #LFMF
When your boyfriend's father thanks you for coming to his mother's funeral, for the love of God, do not reply with, "It's my pleasure." #LFMF
