James_Mayy

Grandmother: If I wrote a book, I'd do it under a pen name because I wouldn't want you to read it...

Dad: When I die, I don't want you to waste money on a nice casket. Bury me in Glad trash bags.

(When I got a scarf for my birthday) Dad: It's the Aerosmith starter kit!

93-year-old grandma: I'm either going crazy or I'm losing my mind.

Mom: Look, if he likes what he likes then he likes what he likes so just shut up and let him like...