RamenxFire

(My dad questioning my sister's date to a Halloween dance) Dad: You ever smoke pot? Date: Yes sir, once, and I didn't like the way I felt out of control of my body. Dad: Drink alcohol? Date: For the same reasons I don't smoke I don't drink. Dad: What is the answer to life, the universe, and everything? Date: 42. Dad: The first person to kidnap Princess Peach was...? Date: Donkey Kong. Dad: When the first Pokemon movie came out and Ash turned to stone? Date: I cried like a bitch.

(Talking to my ten-year-old cousin about Pokemon while celebrating my uncle returning from Iraq.) Me: Bulbasaur was my favorite starter. Cousin: What's a bulbasaur? Uncle: Good work son, the only proper starter is a Charmander. Cousin: What's a charmander? Uncle: (Turns to my aunt) What in God's name have you done to my child?!