If you are an identical twin, and you happen to see your twin in a restaurant with mirrors on the...
(My mom just swiveled the whole car so she would't run over a squirrel) Me: Gosh mom, I didn't k...
Got distracted by squirrel. Missed bus. #LFMF
While on vicodin, stay well aware of your surroundings. The reason you are not wearing a seatbelt...