juzthefun

Mom: Rachel, if you do not come out of your room right now, I will cut out your spleen with knitt...

Me: Let's watch Twilight! Dad: I'd rather rub my penis against a cheese grater.

Me: Why did you guys wait so long with having kids when you got married? Dad: "We didn't know ho...

(I was born with scoliosis and my dad likes to joke about it, which I think is funny.) Dad: I re...