[In grocery store] Mom: So I found out my stripper name today. Me: What? Mom: It's Chesty Sunny...
Me: Mom! What're you doing with my phone!? Mom: Deleting all the dirty joke texts from your frie...
(on a camping trip) Me: Mom, I have something important to tell you. Mom: (flipping burgers and...
(Jehovah Witnesses knock on the door) Mom: *answers door to be polite* Dad: HONEY! Come back! T...
Mom arrives home from the market: WE HAVE MORE JUNK FOOD THAN A POT FARM!