remcog's Favorites
Mom: Your Aunt needs to learn about condoms. She breeds like a rabbit. Me:(silence)
(After graduating from med school) Dad: I always knew you were the smart one. I had you trained to get me beer from the fridge when you were two years old.
Father: (On phone for half hour with telemarketer) "I'm not wearing any pants right now!"
Mom: Do drugs, get pregnant, become a crack whore, ANYTHING! Just DON'T drop the cheesecake!
