shadesworth

Mom: WHAT?!?! I CANT HEAR YOU! IT'S TOO DARK IN HERE!

Me: Grandma, why are you making a cake? Grandma: Because your mother has pneumonia.

Dad: Go make the sandwiches for tonight's dinner. It's good practice for the future.

Me: How do I look? Mom: You look like a biker with herpes. Go change.

(as a 5 year old) Me: Daddy, I'm hungry. Dad: (hands me a can of Coke and a chunk of co-jack ch...

my sister: When the sun hits Titan's atmosphere, it creates organic compounds! Dad: Shut up, ner...

(while teasing my Grandpa) Grandpa: I didnt fight in 'nam for this crap. Me: Erm we're british ...

(on a camping trip) Me: Mom, I have something important to tell you. Mom: (flipping burgers and...

(Jehovah Witnesses knock on the door) Mom: *answers door to be polite* Dad: HONEY! Come back! T...