shadowcharmerkitteh

(Watching TV) Mum: That is a completely inappropriate show for you to be watching! Move over, I'...

(Telling my mum of a clip I had watched on Youtube.) Me: Two guys said that the only proof neede...

Mom: I’m going to sleep in my underwear. Dad: Is that a threat?

Uncle: I want a pet owl. Me: Why...? Uncle: They are so cute, and they eat mice, and they are a...

(We were slinging pun-based insults back and forth and I was winning until...) Dad: You should w...

Me (Coming home from work in the afternoon) Dad: Lily!! What have you done to my carpet? I've tr...

(Me and my mom talking about a vampire book we are reading) Mom: This vampire is dead, isn't he?...

(A VIP is coming too my school tomorrow.) (After I said I saw no secret service agents) Dad: May...

(My Mom and I are at the bank. Mom walks up to the bank manager.) Manager: How can I help you to...

(Dad is making repairs at my apartment and I'm helping.) Dad: Here, hold this (puts something in...

(While driving along a very run-down road) Me: Is this street two lanes? I can't tell since the ...

Dad: While Mom's away, let's become Amish.

Me: Oh look, a weeping willow. (*Dad reaches over and hits me in head*) Dad: Womping Willow

Mom: What's on the radio? I like it. Me: "Chariots of Fire" by Vangelis. Mom: WHAT? "My Cherry'...

(At an amusement park) My boyfriend texted his mom: Where are you? Mom: Just got off the log f...