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Puns are Fun So Here's a Ton

A friend of mine once tried to annoy me with bird puns, but I soon realized that toucan play at that game.

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  • 1
    Cheezburger Image 9019172352
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I'm emotionally constipated. I haven't given a shit in days.


  • 2
    Cheezburger Image 9019172096
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Thieves had broken into my house and stolen everything except my soap, shower gel, towels and deodorant. Dirty Bastards.


  • 3
    Cheezburger Image 9019175424
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Did you hear about the Italian chef with a terminal illness? He pastaway.


  • 4
    Cheezburger Image 9019173888
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I have a few jokes about unemployed people but it doesn't matter none of them work.


  • 5
    Cheezburger Image 9019177984
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Atheism is a non-prophet organization.


  • 6
    Cheezburger Image 9019171584
    Via: avanishprajapati

    When I get naked in the bathroom, the shower usually gets turned on.


  • 7
    Cheezburger Image 9019171840
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I'm glad I know sign language, it's pretty handy.


  • 8
    Cheezburger Image 9019172608
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I am on a seafood diet. Every time I see food, I eat it.


  • 9
    Cheezburger Image 9019172864
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!


  • 10
    Cheezburger Image 9019173376
    Via: avanishprajapati

    A book just fell on my head. I've only got myshelf to blame.


  • 11
    Cheezburger Image 9019173632
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I have a few jokes about unemployed people but it doesn't matter none of them work.


  • 12
    Cheezburger Image 9019174144
    Via: avanishprajapati

    A courtroom artist was arrested today for an unknown reason... details are sketchy.


  • 13
    Cheezburger Image 9019174400
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I'm no photographer, but I can picture us together.


  • 14
    Cheezburger Image 9019174656
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I wanna make a joke about sodium, but Na..


  • 15
    Cheezburger Image 9019174912
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I hate insects puns, they really bug me.


  • 16
    Cheezburger Image 9019175168
    Via: avanishprajapati

    What do prisoners use to call each other? Cell phones.


  • 17
    Cheezburger Image 9019175680
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Having sex in an elevator is wrong on so many levels.


  • 18
    Cheezburger Image 9019175936
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Why did the bee get married? Because he found his honey.


  • 19
    Cheezburger Image 9019176192
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Friends are like boobs. Some big,some small. Some real, some fake.


  • 20
    Cheezburger Image 9019176448
    Via: avanishprajapati

    Friends are like boobs. Some big,some small. Some real, some fake.


  • 21
    Cheezburger Image 9019176704
    Via: avanishprajapati

    How can you spot the blind guy at the nudist colony? It's not hard.


  • 22
    Cheezburger Image 9019176960
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I was going to give him a nasty look, but he already had one.


  • 23
    Cheezburger Image 9019177216
    Via: avanishprajapati

    What do you call people who are afraid of Santa Claus? Claustrophobic


  • 24
    Cheezburger Image 9019177472
    Via: avanishprajapati

    My math teacher called me average. How mean!


  • 25
    Cheezburger Image 9019177728
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I am so poor I can't even pay attention.


  • 26
    Cheezburger Image 9019178240
    Via: avanishprajapati

    I saw an ad for burial plots, and thought to myself this is the last thing I need.

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