Probably not phone home. Probably get lobotomy...now

'She told him sharply to go sit down': Server Disciplines Customer’s Child, Parents Demand to Speak to Manager 1

'By the time she'll notice, I'll be long gone': Employee quits job, micromanager demands they send onboarding documents for next hire, employee sends glitched files instead 2

'She was fired': Boss tries to get writer fired, they've been keeping a paper trail and flip the script 3

The Most Entertaining Reddit Posts of the Week (May 10, 2024) 4

38 Harry Potter Memes for Brave Hogwarts Students Skipping Herbology to Explore Hogsmeade 5

'Wasn't given as a joke': 15 Teacher Appreciation Week gifts that are making teachers roll their eyes 6

Might as well... 1

32 of the Funniest Felines on the Internet and Meowrvelous Memes to Claw Your Way to a Purrfectly Wonderful Weekend 2

Every time 3

Some day, some way 4

Prank call 5

The Best Heartwarmingly Wholesome Memes and Posts of the Week (May 9, 2024) 6