Shirlene

Me: I just saw the coolest bumper sticker, it said "My mother is a travel agent for guilt trips"....

(My dad questioning my sister's date to a Halloween dance) Dad: You ever smoke pot? Date: Yes s...

(My dad talking to my brother after the dog pulled a condom out of his wallet.) Dad: Why is ther...

(While I'm getting ready for work.) Dad: Hey, did you get some coffee? I don't want your white c...