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Texts From Mittens: The Valentine’s Day Edition

Valentine's Day is right around the corner, and Mittens is all upset: Will he receive anything else than the ugly vest from grandma? How is he going to treat his girlfriend, Fiona? And what could be worse than having drunk Patty as a babysitter while his owner is on a romantic date? 

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    Text - ull Furizon 10:43 AM ( Messages Mittens I can't wait for Valentine's Day, Mitty! When is that, Fiona? You forgot about Valentine's Day?? No! I wasn't sure if you meant "Valentine's Day" or "Balenteen's Spay." Not your best save. I could know a "Balenteen!" She could be getting spayed! It's Wednesday. #iknewthat ©Text from Mittens
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    Text - 12:12 PM l Furizon 3G Mittens Edit Messages I don't think I'm going to get any valentines this year. Who are you, Charlie Brown? I think Patty has something for you. Oh goody. A valentine from Drunk Patty. I hope she breathes on me lots when she gives it to me. Says the cat who sleeps with his face in my sweaty running shoes. O More on Catster.com Send
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    Text - 10:12 AM l Furizon 3G Mittens Edit Messages Not wearing it. The Valentine's sweater vest from Grandma? Bingo. Just once. For Grandma. Once again, Mittens' dignity is compromised. Stop being such a poopy-poo. Not helping. O More an Catster.com Send
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    Text - 00000 Furizon 11:18 AM ( Messages Mittens I feel a little bit bad that the dog didn't have a Valentine's date. Earl had a great day. I bought him a new chew toy. But maybe he wanted to have a fancy, romantic dinner. Maybe next year you could spend some extra time with him. I said I only feel a LITTLE bit bad. Send more at catster.com
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    Text - 6:12 PM l Furizon 3G Mittens Edit Messages Why is Drunk Patty here? I have a Valentine's date. Patty's going to feed you and hang out. Sure, you get a fancy dinner and I get manhandled by Drunk Patty. Happy Valentine's Day to me. Just have fun. Oh, I will. #lie #thanksforabandoningm O More at Catster.com Send
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    Text - ull Furizon ? 10:23 AM Messages Mittens Grandma, Fiona is mad at me. Why is she mad, Mitty? I forgot Valentine's Day is this week. Oh, no. What do I do? Be creative. Creative? Like interpretive dance? Mosaic? Pastel art? Something like that. Roger that. #artistatwork ©Texts from Mittens
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    Text - 00000 Furizon 10:56 AM ( Messages Mittens What are you giving your boyfriend for Valentine's Day? Not sure, Mitty. What are you giving Fiona? Not sure, but we should get a few things straight so we don't give duplicate gifts. You steer clear of rhinestone collars or anything in the cardboard family, and 'll avoid anything BORING. Deal. ©Texts from Mittens Send
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    Text - 00000 Furizon 10:33 AM ( Messages Mittens I'm texting Fiona first. Mature choice. I know. Will you ask her if she had a good time on Valentine's Day? No. Asking why she hasn't texted to tell me she had a good time on Valentine's Day. Mittens! Patience is not my strong suit. #HellolAmACat Send more at catster.com
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    Text - ull Furizon 9:45 AM ( Messages Mittens Happy Valentine's Day, Fiona! Hi, Mittens. You're still mad at me? Well, I have a surprise for you. Surprise? I'm going to play you a song on the springy doorstop. Come over tonight. That sounds nice! Thank you. I love you, Mitty. I love you too, Fiona. #boingboing ©Texts from Mittens
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