New Mom Lashes Out After Husband's Constant Sexist Jokes

Having children is quite possibly the most significant commitment you will ever make in your life and one you should only undertake if you plan on doing the hard work involved in raising your kids. This means sharing parental responsibilities with your partner, even if you didn't give birth yourself. Yes, dads, we're talking about you. However, it appears that some fathers don't understand how contributing half the ingredients towards making a child means that you are responsible for half the work in taking care of them. One new mom found out that not all dads believe this to be the case when her husband used sexist jokes as responses to her repeated requests to help her with their baby. She claimed that she did 99% of the work, and her husband refused to help, claiming that it was the women's job to raise babies. When she finally snapped and called him a d*ck, he went off in a huff, making her feel the need to apologize. She posted her dilemma on Reddit's Am I The A—Hole, and unsurprisingly, Redditors had a lot to say in her defense.

Author image for satirequeen satirequeen
  • 01
    Font - Posted by u/professorplopsy 4 days ago 12 5 AITA for calling my husband ad*ck? Not the A-hole I (F33) and husband (M37) had a baby 5 months ago. He really wanted kids, I was on the fence. However, I am the one who does 99% of the baby stuff. Asking him to do something is like pulling teeth sometimes. He keeps making jokes like he doesn't need to do stuff, he has a wife for that, or he can't do something, he's holding the baby. But when I have her I'm expected to do everything?!
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  • 02
    Font - So earlier I was talking about sleep training, how if dad does the check ins then baby doesn't expect food, so he make a "joke" about how he'll just give me one of his t-shirt so he doesn't have to do anything. I lost it and said "why do you have to be such a d ck!?"
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  • 03
    Font - I feel like he makes these jokes at my expense, constantly. They're kind of demeaning and hurt my feelings. But whenever I say something back I'm "so mean".
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  • 04
    Font - Anyway, he took his things and is now sleeping on the couch. I went and said sorry for losing my cool and trying to explain how constantly making chauvinist jokes since he got home had resulted in eventually the last straw. But he is ignoring me. AITA here?
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  • 05
    Font - Edits: I did want a child - I was on the fence because of everything I'd have to give up, not because I didn't want kids. I did want a kid eventually (OAD), it just happened a bit sooner by a year or so than planned.
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  • 06
    Mammal - Husband does help out with some house work, i.e. Unpacking dishwasher every morning, or cleaning on weekends. And he helps with bathtime with baby at night.
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  • 07
    Font - UPDATES: I had a convo with him - he said I'm not pulling my weight because I didn't job hunt this week (I was cleaning the house instead), and once I get a job we will divide tasks more equally. But until I go to work, I get to 'lay about the house and take naps' so he doesn't see why
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  • 08
    Font - he should do more because that's unfair as he has to go to work all day. Also still waiting for an apology, I communicated I wanted one for hurting my feelings.
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  • 09
    Font - False-Explanation702 Colo-rectal Surgeon [33] 4 days ago 2 2 3 2 E 2 NTA. Ask him if he would like his custody split, because if he keeps this shit up, you are leaving him. One baby is enough, you don't need him acting like a child on top of it. And for goodness sake, if/when you wind up leaving him, get a proper legal custody agreement.
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  • 10
    Font - Homicidal_GoldFish81 4 days ago Yeah... OP is soo000000 mean while "father of the year "sits on his ads saying stupid stuff to her. He probably went to the couch to make her door all and say sorry. ,OP should take back her sorry. He don't deserve IT. NTA
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  • 11
    Font - rachy182 3 days ago Of course he really wanted kids. That's coz he never thought he'd actually have to do any work in relation to them. The bar is so low for men that they're labelled dad of the year just for not leaving the family unit even if they're not mentally there for them
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  • 12
    Product - WeeklyConversation8 Partassipant [2] 4 days ago OP, make sure you are on birth control. Use two kinds at least. He wanted children, but doesn't want to actually take care of and raise them.
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  • 13
    Font - Beautiful mistakes 4 days ago NTA Why are YOU apologizing?!?! HE owes you an apology. I would have left him on the couch so he can think about all the hard work you put in. There is nothing funny about someone who uses jokes to belittle you and has misogynistic views. I would suggest couples therapy. It works wonders.
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sexism aita jokes bad jokes husband new mom Reddit mom sexist
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