I think the best course of action for Dad here is to write a sincere letter back, asking the school what exactly a dildo is? Let's milk this ridiculous situation for all it's worth. Long live Wildo the Dildo, may he live a long and fruitful existence being a perpetual pain in the asses (and other places too) of academic institutions, near and far.
Here's the letter in its entirety:
The utter disbelief ran deep over this one
While others just wanted to suggest solid next steps
Terrific idea, bro
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