Brother moves every 6 months at most, always expects free help, and finally gets refused when his sibling chooses not to play free mover for hire: ‘Every time he moves, he expects me to help pack, carry heavy furniture, and drive the rental truck.’

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  • AITJ refusing to help my brother move after he treated me like free labor for years?

    FRAGILE "I told him I could not help because I have my own plans that weekend" CAUTION THIS SIDE UP
  • My brother moves constantly because he never stays in one place longer than six months. Every time he moves he expects me to help pack carry heavy furniture and drive the rental truck.
  • He never offers a meal or even a thank you. He just treats it like something I will do automatically because I am family.
  • This month he announced he is moving again and told me the date as if it was already scheduled on my calendar.
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  • I told him I could not help because I have my own plans that weekend. He got upset and said I knew he relied on me and that I was being selfish for choosing my own activities over his needs.
  • Our mother took his side and said family supports each other. I told her support is not the same as being exploited over and over.
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  • Now the whole family is whispering about how I have changed and become difficult.
  • Sassy-Peanut Well done - you stood up for yourself and if that means you are now 'the difficult one' use it to give yourself some authonomy. You do not exist for the convenience of your brother. Ask which of the rest of your 'family' are offering to step up this time and just watch them scatter.
  • Susan MShwartz Not the jerk. OR the doormat.
  • Vegetable-Section-84 Block him and his supporters on everything Your real family and friends will be on your side Blood doesn't make the family love does NTA NTJ
  • notimportant1975 1 month old account. "Family supports family" etc etc etc Al....
  • Particular_Cycle9667 Yeah, tell him he can hire a mover. Tell him that you're not free labor and just because you have health in the past doesn't mean you're obligated to help every single time, especially since his entitled ass seems to think that you will do all the heavy lifting all the driving and everything for free without even getting The courtesy of a thank you. He is proven that his wants his needs and with his actions that he doesn't care about your feelings or anything he wants you st
  • PearGlum1966 Nope, not TJ. Your brother needs to realise that moving from place to place might be fine for him, but it's not fun for everyone else. The decent thing is to shout lunch to or dinner to those who help. But moving every 6 months and expecting the same people to keep helping you is not realistic. People have lives and do other things on weekends. They don't wait for your brothers call to help him move! Tell him to hire a removalist!
  • Not-a-Cranky-Panda He did not even ask he ordered. I helped a distant cousin move over seven times, I lost count. I only did it to save here Granddad from doing it. If she moved and did not need me for some reason I never got her address, phone number or email I never ever got the last two. One day I bump into her in town and she starts talking to me which I still find odd as normally she'd just walk pass me and I think she was going to ask for something. Someone she knew came up to her and star
  • Carolann0308 NTJ Asking friends or relatives to help you move; in my opinion everyone gets one. After that it's call a moving company
  • Competitive_Ease6991 Ntj. Common misconceptions with asshole families. They confuse setting healthy boundaries with being difficult or selfish.
  • Hopeful-Artichoke449 You just need to make it reciprocal. "Sure bro. I'm also going to need you to come over the weekend before and help me clean out my garage and hang Christmas lights and help me rake up all the leaves". Then match his energy.

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