This teenage son still hasn't forgiven his mother for her affair when he was ten years old. So, when she married the man she had been cheating with, he gave her a book on cheating for their anniversary.
This week, Reddit user u/IGaveTheBook turned to the r/AmItheAsshole subreddit seeking advice and insight on his actions. Contributors often post to this subreddit for third-party insight into their issues, asking readers and commenters whether or not they are the a-hole in the situation.
u/IGaveTheBook shared this story and gave a little insight into the situation and relationship.
"I visited her as often as I could, and she always seemed so happy when I was there, but I hated her new family, so I stopped visiting." Explains u/IGaveTheBook. "I visited her as often as I could, and she always seemed so happy when I was there, but I hated her new family, so I stopped visiting."
As circumstances would eventually dictate, u/IGaveTheBook finally found himself at his mother's house for an extended period even though the two "rarely ever saw each other." When his dad went away on business and grandparents were away, the only other option was to stay at his mother's house. And it just so happened to be her anniversary.
u/IGaveTheBook explains the feelings of isolation and sadness that he feels when he is around his mother.
"She tried to cuddle with me like before she left us, but it made me angry like we can't go back in time and pretend it's how it was." says u/IGaveTheBook.
These feelings of resentment and anger led u/IGaveTheBook to an idea. For his mother's anniversary, he would give her a copy of Anna Karenina, a novel that famously centers on an extramarital affair. His mother was a literature major so that detail wouldn't be lost on her, and u/IGaveTheBook was counting on it.
The gift went according to plan and had the desired effect. That night he could hear his mother "crying really loudly."
u/IGaveTheBook wants to know if he is the a-hole here, and commenters seem to agree on this point:
Yes, he is an AH, but he also intended to be. His mother is ultimately the a-hole for her actions, which has caused irreparable damage to her relationship with her son.
u/IGaveTheBook needs to seek help and decide whether or not he even wants his relationship with his mother to continue, and his mother needs to strive to properly make amends as best she can.
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Thumbnail image Eric Golub
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