Animal Comedy Newsletter

Tumblr Animal Posts Of Hilarity And Pawfectly Reasonable Explanations To Silly Things

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    Rectangle - the fingerinthemiddle universalthaumaturge ... homunculus-argument The reason why german shepherds are the way they are isn't that they're stupid, they just have so much energy that they run out of smart things to do, and doing stupid shit is infinitely better than doing nothing. They'll do the smart thing when one is available, yes, but if a german shepherd was a person, they'd be the type to make a 23-point to-do-list for a day, start working on it at 7:30 in the morning, be done w

    This is honestly the kind of outlook that we want to have about everything in the world. We would like to be able to look at the dumbest humans in front of us and describe them in this manner. We feel like if we were able to do this on a consistent enough basis, we would be much happier humans overall lol.

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    Font - lesbianshepard do flat earthers think earth still moves in space like some sort of planet sized frisbee lesbianshepard this is my new religion god made the frisbee- earth and then just tossed us into the abyss lesbianshepard the world ends when his dog catches it

    See? This is the perfect example of what we were talking about in the previous post. This is taking a group of people with a crazy theory and rather than thinking of them as silly and irrational, we think of them as funny. This is what we're gonna think about when we encounter flat earthers now. We'll be smiling throughout the entire conversation with them.

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    Dog - glumshoe What I say: "I'm touch-starved." What you think I mean: "I need a hug." What I truly mean: "I need someone to platonically lie across me with their full weight, crushing my body and providing deep pressure until my errant soul is reabsorbed into my flesh. Also, a hug would be nice!" glumshoe I've had to explain this to people who think it's weird, but when I add, "You know... like cats..." they seem to understand.
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    Product - 11:06 nes Follow Clare Cons @macrotargeting extevens hey babe is everything ok you haven't touched your croisshark 12:05 PM Sep 22, 2021 Twitter for iPhone 74.7k notes (( Follow bittern physically, yes, i could eat acroisshark but emotionally? imagine the toll : ↑] 3
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    Cat - sixpenceee Did you know that bees sleep between 5-8 hours a day, sometimes in flowers? Also, they like to sleep with other bees and hold each other's feet. Source angeldusted-fairies 6.3
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    Product - Buzz buzzfeed Feeo If you put a dot on the Major League Baseball logo, it looks like a bird with arms. communistbakery the content I joined this site for Source: buzzfeed 220,184 notes ...
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    Bird - awed-frog A crow stealing a handful of Cheerios. Photo: Queenie Lynn Zook. ritavonbees Queenia Zook #thank GOD i have NEVER been so glad to read a caption#i ASSUMED the crow had teeth and that was an AWFUL fraction of a second GOD ME TOO Source: awed-frog 26,695 notes ... 17
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    Cat - tilthat TIL that a cat once co-authored a physics paper. In 1975, a physicist had just finished writing a paper and was ready to publish but realized that he had used 'we' instead of 'I' throughout, despite being the sole author. Not wanting to edit the paper, he listed his cat, Chester, as a co-author. via http://ift.tt/2pvbu4c mikkeneko This is the cat, by the way: I trust him cake-and-monsters @scowlow! scowlowl oh my god thank you Source: tilthat 386,771 notes
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    Font - sleipnirohara what people think cat ownership is: sitting in a chair by a roaring fire while a purring fur baby lounges in your lap and presents their tum for pets in a display of love and trust what cat ownership actually is: me chasing my cat around the dining room table, waving a fork and screaming "STOP EATING TAPE™ Source: slothbless 75,339 notes
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    Cat - poliziotta This is what cat engagement photos would look like. Source: luminumimuni 354,667 notes ...
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    Dog - running-dog Of course that's why the chairs have that feature. It's a snout rest, intended for the comfort of snouts. What else would you do with it? Source: silkenagentsofcsbeck 81,487 notes □♡
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    Dog - WebMD Petting dogs is actually good for your health, study finds. WebMD Feature by James Nielssen WebMD Feature Archive Ⓒ samovy lemonoxide SUBSCRIBE this article was written by a dog in disguise to get pet by ALL the humans animentality so?? he worked hard for his phD, I believe him 444,504 notes
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    Dog - Meet our Mortgage Adviser Back! O schoot Here to help you every step of the way Call in today migrainemami I would love to meet him! Source: delva 51,205 notes 17

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