'She was going to hire a 'professional'...': Boss refuses to stop cleaning computer until it's ruined, because her method would 'really clean it out'

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    Font - r/Stories About Kevin Posted by u/alas_vikn The Flintstone Chronicles: Part 1 Kevina and Computers XXXL A humble submission from my partner, for your consideration; The Flintstone Chronicles Why the the Flintstones, because this group of stories has to do with a stone company and due to the actions of the staff you would swear they had just recently evolved from the Stone Age.
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    Font - For our first story, let's set the scene. Kevina has been in this industry for 10 years, has worked at this stone company for all of those years and is in a management position. Which is good news for Kevina, as she has 0 transferable skills that could get any other job. One of the only reasons she is in a 'managerial' role is because it is a front office of 1 person. It's widely believed that she conveniently named herself Office Manager and no one thought to question it. As it was such
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    Font - When productivity was slow, Kevina tried to win some brownie points with Big Boss and decided to get a virus sweep done on the office computer. She was going to hire a 'professional' to come in and do the job. She found this 'professional' on a local community board who professed to be a Microsoft Specialist.
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    Font - This person came in, completed a disc clean up, a defrag, deleted old emails to add space to the email account, and ran a security check on virus software that was already installed.
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    Font - This took most of the day, why you may ask, because this professional was googling and reading how-to instructions from her phone which was balanced on her lap while at the desk.
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    Font - But this did not phase Kevina. She was all too happy to tell everyone how good the computer was running after this executive decision. How the person she found was so00o good at computers. Then she proceed to invoice Big Boss for the 'professionals' time. To the grand sum of $350.
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    Font - This should set the tone of how Kevina operates, not very good at anything, but so desperate to have control over the office that she would come up with these ideas to assure herself of her own worth/competence nay crucial abilities. Why the whole company would collapse without her!
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    Font - The next time Kevina would turn her attention to the office computer, it resulted in disaster. And sadly didn't result in her firing. But certainly a blow to her ego, until she promptly forgot about it, in what could only be self preservation. You see, at this point, she has hired an 'office helper'. This helper was fresh out of college, eager to learn and to please and importantly already very smart with notable references as well as 3 languages learned.
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    Font - Why helper got a job here is still a mystery. But Kevina, so proud of her new recruit and leading him around the office like a mother duck. She decided to teach the youngin how to clean a computer. This computer was already having power issues which is another story we may detail later. But suffice to say, the computer was already unplugged so might as well clean it!
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    Font - Being a stone company, dust was everywhere. So in fairness it could use it. But as Kevina searches for the compressed air can, she can't find any. Now why in earth would they be out of air canisters. A good office manager would have stayed on top of making sure the office was well supplied. But this is Kevina's job. So it wasn't. But fear not! Kevina had a better idea! Use the industrial air compressor from the back shop!!
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    Font - Now some of you may already see the issue with this. But add on that this was a hot and humid day in the height of summer. The Air compressor was in the shop which has no air conditioning. No moisture relief valve, and hasn't been used all day. Kevina diligently brings the tower of the computer outside, sets it down gently. Runs the hose off the compressor and let it rip!
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    Font - A jet of water at an untold rate soaked the entire tower. Any reasonable person would have stoped. But Kevina either didn't realize what was happening, or too embarrassed to stop and consider she made a foolish decision, presses on. Continuing to soak the computer and shooting to her helper that 'This will really clean it out'.
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    Font - Once done with now power washing of the computer, she brought the sodden piece of technology inside and set it back in its place. And went about reconnecting the cables. To her utter shock, the computer wouldn't turn on!!! She shrugged and turned to her helper and said "Well, we'll let it do its thing and have a moment."
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    Font - As if the computer was someone who was just waterboarded and need a moment to catch its breath before functioning and doing the important work of bringing up her Facebook feed.
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    Font - Now sadly the computer didn't resurrect its self, as when you mix stone dust and water and allow it to dry, you have some concrete like sludge. Even if the poor thing sputtered to life, the fan would probably been locked in place and some sort of self destruction would have occurred.
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    Font - Happy to say say the helper took no lesson from this and the office got a new computer the next week. Hope you enjoyed, if there is any interest I can gather some more stories for your amusement. All the best!
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    Font - Indigo-Shade Bring on the crazy, this sounds like a great opportunity for lots of face-palming and laughs.
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    Font - endersgame69 This is honestly sad. I would venture that they're aware of their lack of ability and struggle with anxiety quite a bit. This whole description of her reeks of her insecurity.
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    Font - capn_kwick Even if the air compressor was fully functional and was emitting dry air, the difference in pressure between it and a can of office canned air would probably have resulted in some kind of damage.
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    Font - BigD1970 Yep, I definitely want to hear more from you. Keep 'em coming.
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    Organism - angelmakr9 Awe yes the self- proclaimed office manager bwahaha!!
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    Smile - pjshawaii And, I would hazard a guess, the computer wasn't backed up.

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