Welcome everyone, to this year's Dapper and Derpy Doggo Parade, where the most elegant and derpy canine comrades come to strut their stuff! This parade has a long and proud history, dating back to Derplandia's Wooftorian era. It is said that Queen Wooftoria, of derpy fame, fell in love with a noble from a foreign land, a dapper doggo of much grace and elegance.
After many trials and tribulations, the majestic queen(then a princess), managed to convince the court and her royal parents of the benefits of having a less than derpy king. And so she married her love, which led to an age of prosperity for Derplandia, and the citizens would later come to honor their Queen and King with a barktastic parade in their honor.
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Gather round ye pups, and hear the tale of Sir Flaurderpus, the derpy knight of flowers. As lord of the Flower Gardens of Derplandia, his main responsibility was to guard the flowers, and he would do so by frolicking with joy in the fields all day long, and any who would try to steal flowers would be enthralled by his frolicking, and join him.
In the annals of Derplandia's history, one name stands above all others in terms of derpy elegance, and that name is Lady Penelopy Derpledown. The history books say that her prowess in both derpiness and elegance was so strong that she could have easily replaced the royals.
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