'The entire house went silent': Family members guilt trip a couple into having kids, so they clap back in a way that shuts down the conversation for good

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Jesse Kessenheimer • Writer and Editor
Nov 25, 2023 12:00 PM EST

For childfree couples, the holiday season is usually the time of year you get chased around by all of your aunties and older cousins, pestering you about your life choices, your aging physique, and your inability to (so far) provide your bloodline with an heir. What is it, the 1700's? Is that all we're good for? Well, modern couples have developed techniques for deflecting the timeless 'when are you having kids' question, but for some people, deflection isn't enough to keep the family vultures from picking at your carcass every time you have a nice meal together. But it required drastic measures and a hefty dose of gumption to quiet the whispering voices of the more gossipy family members.

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    Cheezburger Image 9841815552
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  • Not everyone wants to have kids, but for old school aunts and uncles, once you're coupled off and over a certain age, the clock is ticking. Except, it's not so simple. For some people there are logistical problems with childbearing or even health complications that make the idea of having a kid seem less like a dream and more like a nightmare. 

  • So if you're a childfree adult and planning on staying that way for the foreseeable future, this story might inspire you to stand up for yourself over the next turkey roast. Scroll to read more about one couple that simply couldn't take the pressure anymore, spouting a spell of irrefutable reasoning that shut their family up for good. 

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    D r/traumatizeThemBack Posted by A u/sin_smith_3 7 hours ago I made them stop asking for grandbabies. matched energy My wife (41f) and I (34f) got married 5 years ago, and immediately her aunties and cousins began to demand that we have children. We
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    held them off for a bit but then it became the main topic of conversation whenever we visited. As I am the younger of the two of us, it was assumed I would be the carrier. Well, after one auntie started guilt tripping us, I had finally had enough.
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    I raised my voice so everyone could hear, and then reminded the auntie that my wife is a carrier for Muscular Dystrophy and my doctor has repeatedly warned me against pregnancy because it has a high chance of killing me. The entire house went silent for a shocked moment.
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    Then the auntie hesitantly suggested adoption, and I asked "with what money???" No one has mentioned us having kids since.
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    hinky-as- . 7 hr. ago Weird that your auntie didn't offer up her savings account for adoption! 1905 898 Reply Share dommiichan 6 hr. ago pass around the hat...or start a gofundme
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    sin_smith_3 OP. 1 day ago I mean, they say it takes a village... my village needs to cough up. Reply Share 834 FormalWeb7094. 1 day ago If getting pregnant might kill you, I think it would be appropriate if the aunties would offer to carry the baby for you. Risk averted. Or you could remind them that between you and your wife, you have a shortage of sperm. Sperm is always a great topic for conversation.
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    Crippled CuntPunch 1 day ago As someone who has Muscular Dystrophy, I agree with your decision. If I had kids they would likely have it as well and I couldn't do that to another person. It's a living 307 Reply Share ElegantAmphibian4252 1 day ago Here's a hug for you (())
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    CzechYourDanish 1 day ago Demanding that someone have children. Some people, and their .... entitlement. 86 Reply Share life-is-satire 1 day ago My dad asked me about grandkids at my wedding.
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    SpookyCatMischief 17 hr. ago i love the smell of drama i didnt create I literally was asked, whilst still in the hospital with my second baby (and son), when we would be trying for a girl. After my 3rd baby (and again, son), born with a congenital heart condition I got sterilized but chose not to really announce my business. People still ask when our girl is coming, despite my insistence I am closed up for shop.
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    3catsfull 15 hr. ago I met my current partner in March while I was in the midst of a divorce. I met his mother in May, two months after we started dating. She immediately asked when we were going to "have one" (it was a birthday party for his 2-year-old niece), and has asked every time I've met her since then, even after we both firmly told her it wasn't going to happen.
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    I'm very close to, next time she brings it up, saying something along the lines of, "well, first of all I'm almost 40 and secondly, I spent the last decade of my life raising a man-baby who kept begging me to have a baby with him because he thought it would fix his problems...and after I fixed MY marriage problem I was just happy to meet your son, a man who can actually pull his weight in a relationship. Please let me enjoy some peace." Now I'm hopeful that might have a similar effect!
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    bbbdhy 23 hr. ago We cut off family that were hounding us for grandkids - we choose to be childfree. I refuse to speak with my dad after he blew his rocket at us because we werent following the "traditional" way (hes an early boomer, european and stringent catholic). I dont need those :heads in my life
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    jjwhitaker 1 day ago It's a dog whistle suggesting disapproval in your relationship and what they see as 'lacking' from a traditional marriage. It could be completely innocent and built in bias/culture or I'm just a commenter on the internet reading into a 100 word post.
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    lazytemporaryaccount - 23 hr. ago same- While I agree that it's possible that this is a dig at the fact they are in a relationship, honestly most heterosexual couples get this barrage of questions as well. The fact that the relatives are chiming in could actually be a sign that the same- being treated like all the other couples in the family. I think there's couple is too much nuance to tell based on one post.
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    Repyro 15 hr. ago Yeah, I'm straight and single and they still won't stop asking about that occasionally. That's what old people do with relatives: comment on how they're growing the first half, then marriage and kids on the back half.
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    TauntaBeanie 11 hr. ago Good for you! I wanted kids and couldn't have them. People have thrown the adoption thing at me like I'm an idiot. My response is "well between being a caregiver for my grandma before my mom's stroke and then my husband's heart attack immediately followed by cancer I guess I just didn't have time." People can be such a$$hats
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    pinkicchi 9 hr. ago My father in law has literally just asked me this morning, two weeks postpartum, when the next one will be. I have an autoimmune disease and this pregnancy was I. I literally think another one would damage me to the point of no return. We have two. That is a perfectly acceptable amount of kids. I told him in no uncertain terms that no, I wouldn't be doing that to myself again, he has the grandson he wanted now, that should be enough.
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    Dookie boy 22 hr. ago Is adoption 4-2 ↓ expensive ??? Reply Share Les Drama611 20 hr. ago From the Google search I looked in (which, you could have done btw) it says the cost is between $20,000 to $45,000. So, yes. Adoption is expensive.
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    00 CaesarsLegion01. 3 hr. ago My MIL hasn't spoken to me about kids since i told her about how i feel after my dad died. But she recently asked my fiance about it. Im hoping she asks me again because im gonna be very
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