The 50 Best Tweets Of 2023 From Our Favorite Comedic Canine Account 'Thoughts of Dog' To Celebrate A Year Of Wholesome Doggo Moments

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  • 01
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings > sometimes. it's easy to tell. that the human's life is hard. but that's okay. because i have cuddles. and i'm not going anywhere
  • 02
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings one of the small neighbor humans. was outside. blowing magic rainbow spheres. so of course i went over to investigate. i know they were magic. because every time i tried to catch one. it disappeared. i have since concluded. that this small neighbor human. is a wizard
  • 03
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings a ladybug has infiltrated the household. it doesn't seem to want any trouble. maybe it was just lonely. i shall follow it around. slowly and carefully. because i'm a little lonely too
  • 04
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings WE ARE IN THE CAR. NOT SURE WHERE WE'RE HEADED. BUT THE WINDOWS ARE DOWN. AND I'M EATING THE WIND
  • 05
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings gooooob morning. i am going to have. a great day. i haven't figured out how yet. but that's not important
  • 06
    Thoughts of Dog → @dog_feelings on the walk today. we stumbled across a playground. i learned that slides only work one way. and the human carried my fren. up to the highest part there. i bet they could see. the whole world
  • 07
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings i accidentally dropped my bone. on the human's bare foot. they did not enjoy this. and i don't know how to tell them. i'm so sorry
  • 08
    Thoughts of Dog → @dog_feelings i have stolen a yogurt lid. from the trash. it's nothing personal. i was just feeling angsty. but now the human is chasing me. and i have no choice. but to evade them spectacularly
  • 09
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings gooooob morning. the human made waffles. and i got to taste one. what i'm trying to say. is never give up on your dreams
  • 10
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings i found. the perfect spot in the yard. where the sun shines through the trees. and toasts me like a marshmallow
  • 11
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings i can fit in your lap. no measurements required. just trust me <
  • 12
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings gooooob morning. today is a very busy day.. after the midday snoozle. i have a meeting with my stuffed fren sebastian. about what to do. if we're ever separated in public. then it's my turn. to watch the skittle under the fridge. this is of course. followed by another snoozle
  • 13
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings the human and i. are at a big party. with the whole family. and i was asked not to bring up. any controversial topics. such as: • pills wrapped in cheese • sticks in the household ears going inside out ● Follow • escalators • whether i can get on that couch : ...
  • 14
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings gooooob morning. there are people on the roof. the human says they're fixing it. but i'm not convinced. please set the household alert level. to light gray
  • 15
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow stealing a sock from the laundry: easy. childish. been done many times before ... stealing a sock directly from the human's foot: brave. daring. immediately in the history books
  • 16
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings i was awoken from my snoozle. by a car coming down the street. quite rude of them to be honest. i was dreaming of peanut butter >
  • 17
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings WE'RE GOING ON A HIKE. AND I'M CARRYING MY TRAVEL BOWL. IN CASE OF THIRST. BUT I HAVE To keep stopping, and looking back. because the human is slow. and i am speedy >
  • 18
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings what do i. want to be for halloween? smooched. cuddled. and cherished Follow : ...
  • 19
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings the human said. they might make pancakes in the morning. so the faster i fall asleep. the sooner i get a pancake.as you can imagine. it's hard to snoozle. under so much pressure >
  • 20
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings if i happen. to lie down on your foot. you're not allowed to move. you should feel honored
  • 21
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings gooooob morning. before the human left. to do whatever they do. they gave my fren and i. a longer hug than usual. I'm not sure what was on their mind. but it's certainly gone now. because our long hugs. are very powerful
  • 22
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings we had a big adventure planned for today. but the sky droplets just won't stop. so i think we'll watch a movie. and cuddle so close. we become. a single entity
  • 23
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow great. because of the beep. the human found the phone. i have been using to send these tweets ...
  • 24
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings we have a predicament. i just watched the small neighbor human. skip down the street. and get on board. the biggest yellow car i have ever seen where are they taking them? why wasn't i invited? did they remember to pack. enough snacks for the day? are they ever. coming back?
  • 25
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow the human said. they might make pancakes in the morning. so the faster i fall asleep. the sooner i get a pancake. as you can imagine. it's hard to snoozle. under so much pressure
  • 26
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings i just woke up. from my early afternoon snoozle, which means we're not far away. from the midafternoon snoozle. but i may have to reschedule. the pre-evening snoozle. i'm just too busy
  • 27
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings sometimes. i hear my fren bork. so i start borking. even if i have no idea what i'm borking about. you cannot convince me. i'm not helping
  • 28
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow my ball rolled under the couch. and i cannot reach it. the human has been informed of the issue. and reminded. that my problems. are their problems
  • 29
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings every time i get brushed. i have to take my collar off. the human always laughs. and says that i'm naked. but joke's on them. i'm very confident in my body
  • 30
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings a human is at the door with a package. i know i'm supposed to bork around. perhaps even cause a rumpus. but they're just doing their job. and i'm kind of tired. so i'll just wiggle a bit. and smile through the window. to thank them for the gift
  • 31
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings < gooooob morning. i had a dream. that i was chasing my tail. and started spinning so fast. i went back in time. and high-fived a dinosaur
  • 32
    Thoughts of Dog ✔ @dog_feelings i had a long talk. with my fren. about how to spot. a fake ball throw. the optimal strategy. is to follow the ball. with your eyes. instead of your heart
  • 33
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow the human is spending the day. looking for "the best deals." on their little computer. but i think i am offering. a pretty good deal myself. they feed me. and i will love them so much. forever
  • 34
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow WE ARE AT THE PARK. BUT THE HUMAN SAYS IT'S TIME TO LEAVE. WHICH DOESN'T MAKE SENSE. BECAUSE THEY CAN'T CATCH ME
  • 35
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow the human said. they might make pancakes in the morning. so the faster i fall asleep. the sooner i get a pancake. as you can imagine. it's hard to snoozle. under so much pressure
  • 36
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow the human wiped away my eye booger. only to pet it back onto me. i have never experienced such betrayal
  • 37
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i have stolen a yogurt lid. from the trash. it's nothing personal. i was just feeling angsty. but now the human is chasing me. and i have no choice. but to evade them spectacularly
  • 38
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i had a long talk. with my fren. about how to spot. a fake ball throw. the optimal strategy. is to follow the ball. with your eyes. instead of your heart
  • 39
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i was told. whenever a square car with sirens passes by. they are on their way to help. so i always howl along. to let everyone know. i'm helping too
  • 40
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i woke up this morning. feeling incredibly motivated. i am going to start a hole- digging club at the park. the goal will not just be. to dig more holes. but to dig better holes
  • 41
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow occasionally. the freezer will provide crunch water. this is way better than regular water. because of the crunch
  • 42
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow surround yourself. with those who would flip your ear back for you. if it ever went inside out
  • 43
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow on special occasions. during car rides. we go around a little loop. talk to a robot. and then they give us things. sometimes they give me a cup of whipped cream. with a fancy italian name. and i absolutely lose my mind
  • 44
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow the human just picked up my back foot. pressed all my toe beans. then held my foot to my ear. as if they dialed a phone. nobody picked up though. i will have to leave a message
  • 45
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i worked. so. hard. to get the squeaker out of that toy. and you just. threw it away
  • 46
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow ... it often seems. like the human is jealous of me. because of how happy i get. about the simplest things. i don't know how to tell them. they can do that too
  • 47
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow ... days of the week mean very little to me. but they mean everything. to the human. for example. today is a pretty okay day of the week. and so are the next few. but after that. terrible. you would think the world is ending. then we slowly get okay again
  • 48
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow ... gooooob morning. i helped walk the small neighbor human. to the bus at the end of the street. i tried to get on with them. but was quickly denied. they know that with an education. i'd be too powerful
  • 49
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i am feeling chaotic today. so i am off to look for trouble. if i cannot find it. i will create it
  • 50
    Thoughts of Dog @dog_feelings Follow i am tired of the human pretending. they don't control the weather. sometimes they open the door. and it leads into the rain. but i have literally seen them. open the exact same door. and it be sunny on the other side

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