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'This is unacceptable': Worker demands a shiny silver new laptop from disgruntled IT guy, he tells her boss

Everyone who has ever been stuck working on a company laptop that is frightfully unsuited to its task knows the pain of receiving a decrepit hand-me-down of a machine from the IT department, and anyone who has ever been issued a company computer will be able to tell you they've had this exact experience. So, there you are, desperately attempting to remain efficient whilst enduring higher load-processing times than when you tried to play flash games on your parents' dial-up internet and navigating more sudden crashes than when you first installed Windows Vista on the family computer.

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Posted by Brad Dickson
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  • While you type away on your hand-me-down laptop that was already bottom-of-the-barrel performance when it was first purchased in 2016, your boss, who does no technical work, is happily hunt-and-peck typing at 20 WPM on their brand new machine that's jam-packed with RAM for attending Zoom meetings and responding to emails. Any time you attempt to raise the conversation of getting a new machine, they have no idea what you're complaining about because—from where they're sitting, behind the screen of their underutilized powerhouse of a machine—they can't possibly fathom the issue you face.

    What I'm saying here is I get the struggle productive workers face in trying to secure equipment for themselves that will actually allow them to do their job at a respectable level. Simultaneously, I understand the difficulty these IT departments face in providing this equipment whilst holding to razor-thin budgets that have been set for them.

    Still, there will always be those requesting equipment that they don't need for all the wrong reasons… Like our aforementioned manager on their superpowered machine. Was the worker in this story really just looking for any excuse to get rid of the terrible machine she had been handed? Or was she really one of those types who just wanted the shiniest new machine? It's impossible to say, but here's how this IT Guy got one over on her when she went over his head to his boss.

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  • 1
    r/r/MaliciousCompliance Posted by u/Trippynet 13 hours ago But I wanted a silver laptop! LOC First time posting here, so apologies for any mistakes. This story dates back to about 9 years ago when I (31 M at the time this took place) worked as a lead IT technician for a very large multinational company. It's a bit long, so sorry about that. The company had a range of different laptops available for employees to choose from that were classified by their size and weight (this is important later),
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  • 2
    screen) as well as "lightweight laptops" (smaller, thinner and with a 12.5" screen - handy if you're a frequent traveller). Most of these laptops were pretty boring, grey, business devices, nothing special to look at. Anyway, one day the computer manufacturer introduced a new lightweight laptop model that was silver in colour and far more sleek and good-looking than the previous grey model. We'd deployed a few of these around the building and soon got a visit from a lady who'd seen one of her co
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  • 3
    SE: "How do I go about getting one of those smaller laptops?" Me: "Your current (standard) laptop isn't due to be replaced yet, but you can request a change to a "lightweight laptop" on the IT website. Your manager will need to approve it however" Now to be honest, I wasn't a particular fan of people who waste the company's money simply by wanting the latest shiny gadget - especially because it creates additional work for my team, and involves replacing equipment that is still perfectly function
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  • 4
    SE walked away, and the next day an approved request came through for a lightweight laptop. Fair enough. What she didn't know was that company policy dictated that we only provided a brand-new laptop if we didn't have usable second-hand laptops in stock (ie, those handed back to IT from people who'd left the company). Being the good IT tech that I am, I scoured our return shelf and sure enough there was a used lightweight laptop in stock. Unfortunately for this lady, it was last years' grey mode
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  • 5
    SE: "This isn't the one I wanted! I wanted the silver one!" Me: "Sorry, company policy is that we can only order a new laptop if we don't have usable second-hand ones in stock." SE: "But this is not the one I ordered!" Me: "Yes it is, you ordered a lightweight laptop and this is exactly what we've set up for you" (I turn the laptop over and show her the company sticker confirming it to be the same classification of "lightweight laptop" as her request, and show her that it is physically smaller a
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  • 6
    SE: "No, I wanted a new silver one. This is unacceptable, I'm going to complain to your boss." She stormed off in a huff and I could soon hear her complaining inside my boss's office. Unfortunately, although my boss knew I was just following process, he couldn't handle all of the repeated moaning and soon folded and asked me to order a new device for her. I wasn't at all pleased at being overruled when I was simply applying company policy - particularly when it's just a waste of money for an SE
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  • 7
    I could have just scoured our shelf of brand new laptops and dug out a new one for her (we installed dozens of laptops a week - it was a big company, so we always had plenty of new ones in stock), but I was told to *order* a new one, so that's the process I'd follow. Me: "OK, we can order a brand-new silver one for you, but you'll need to raise another request ticket so we can order the laptop from it." I said this knowing full-well that this ticket would go to SE's manager once again for approv
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  • 8
    Sure enough, an hour later I get a phone call from SE's manager: Manager: "Why is SE ordering yet another laptop?" Me: "She didn't like the colour of the laptop we'd prepared for her, it was grey and she wanted a silver one" Manager: "How much is this going to cost me?"
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  • 9
    Me: "Well, you'll still be paying the monthly lease costs on SE's original laptop as it wasn't due for replacement, plus the lease costs of the lightweight laptop we prepared for her earlier, and there'll also be the lease costs for this new laptop as well" Manager: "Oh no. I'm not paying for all that, I'll reject this ticket and I'll have a word with her". A short while later, SE returns. She's rather quiet and humble now after being chastised by her boss for trying to waste all his budget in t
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  • 10
    Edit: As this question has been asked, I wanted to clarify something: The laptops are all on monthly leases and the way it worked was that the lease cost was aligned to the last department that had the laptop. Once we re-deploy a laptop to someone else, the lease is transferred. So as we'd essentially have her original laptop and rejected laptop sitting on our shelves for a bit, her department would still pay the leases until we gave them to someone else. Even if they're only there for a couple
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  • 11
    SkwrlTail 12 hr. ago . "One silver laptop coming right up!" *rattle of a spray can being shaken* Reply Share Vote bmorris0042. 11 hr. ago Almost how I thought this was going to go at first. Vote Reply Share Flcn16Mech 11 hr. ago You're not the only one... ✩ Vote Reply Share
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  • 12
    jschinker 10 hr. ago I had a new boss come in a few years ago. We're an Apple shop, and he's an Apple fanboy, so I was expecting this to go very well. We had just purchased new MacBook Airs for graphic arts. They had better processors, double the memory, and double the storage of anything else in the organization. The only issue was that they were rose gold. We typically use gray or silver, but bought these on purpose because the specs were different and I wanted them to be easily identifiable.
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  • 13
    I told one of my techs to grab one of those and set it up for him, because he was coming in the next day, and I wanted to be able to just hand him his new device. "I can't use that. It's pink." "It's by far the best Macbook we have. I could set up a different one for you, but you're not going to be happy with it." "I can't use that. It's pink." So we set up an older Air, and he complained about it for six months. Finally, he bought his own MacBook Pro, from his budget, and has been using it ever
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  • 14
    Noortman 12 hr. ago Wasn't too long as the details showed the situation. Great MC!! Vote Reply Share
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  • 15
    Fat Bloke4 10 hr. ago Several places where I have worked avoided this problem with a diktat stating that "shiny new devices" or anything non-standard were for only for directors. And directors are always happy to defend their privileges from any managers with ideas above their pay grade. Vote Reply Share Trippynet OP. 6 hr. ago We did have those as well, Ultralight Laptops such as the Lenovo X1 Carbon. Only for the Execs and above. Vote Reply Share
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  • 16
    Rich Baby9954. 12 hr. ago Very well written OP, didn't feel long at all. Awesome MC! ME Vote ♂ Vlaams Belanger. 11 hr. ago It read well, as the formatting was done correctly. Kudos. Vote Reply Share Vote Reply Share ... Trippynet OP 11 hr. ago Many thanks to you both, I've been pondering submitting this for a while. Glad you enjoyed it as much as I did at the time :) Reply Share
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  • 17
    TexasYankee212 Your boss has no Vote · 6 hr. ago Vote Reply Share Trippynet OP. 5 hr. ago He was generally a pretty cool guy. I think he was just quite busy and wanted an easy way to get rid of the lady that was ranting beside his desk for several minutes. Still, it worked out. He got rid of her, and her complaining just led to a telling-off from her own boss. Reply Share
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  • 18
    capskinfan 11 hr. ago So basically the process worked as intended... Vote Reply Share
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  • 19
    Techn0ght 10 hr. ago Previous company I was at, our division SVP went through a new device every couple of weeks looking for that unicorn he'd fall in love with. There were about 20 various one- offs that IT then had to support after he'd turn them back in and some Director or Sr Manager would snap them up; you know, rather than the 3 standard models they had that everyone else had to work with. Same company, apparently I was the only person to ever turn in their company phone. IT manager was sh
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  • 20
    EmersonLucero - 4 hr. ago When I was head of Corp IT we had these same people wanting the new shiny. We would order 10 laptops at a time of one type about every quarter. One chungus type and one travel type. When someone wanted the new shiny but was not in queue then I would tell them I will add to the next quarter queue once approval from their VP was done. If the three month wait deter them, the 3 year TCO cost to a budget for a new laptop charged to their department would be the stopper. Only
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  • 21
    redhairarcher 2 hr. ago When Blackbery was still a thing and smartphones didn't exist yet I worked for a company where everyone wanted shiny and new. We supported hundreds of old type Blackberries with a plastic body and full qwerty keyboard costing €1000 each. Then some managers got the shiny new phone like model, of course everyone wanted a new one. They were refused because the old model was still good enough. After several toilet "accidents" management gave in and just approved all requests.
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  • 22
    CryAncient 12 hr. ago I love it! I hope one of these days I will finally be able to land an IT position and be able to share IT related MC stories too. Vote Reply Share Trippynet OP. 10 hr. ago I don't have many examples to be honest as most of the people there were great folk that obeyed the rules and treated us with respect. I'll always go out of my way to help people who are polite and respectful. Generally speaking, it was a job that I enjoyed. If you do land an IT position, hopefully it's w
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  • 23
    7foot6er 4 hr. ago why did you choose company policy over making a coworker happy once your boss approved it? is saving company money that important? Vote Reply Share
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  • 24
    The Truthkeeper 11 hr. ago (SE) . Please don't do this. Call her Sue, call her Shiny Employee, call her | McDumbass (probably shouldn't actually do this), but acronyms like this are a pain in the ass to read. Vote Reply Share
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  • 25
    panicboy333 11 hr. ago But... she wasn't taking the older lightweight laptop, so why would she be charged for that. one? Surely it just goes back into your stock? ✩ Vote Reply Share gravelpi 7 hr. ago Never underestimate the weirdness of accounting at large companies! (the OP's explanation sounds perfectly reasonable to me having lived in this world) Vote Reply Share
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  • 26
    Severed Eyeball. 5 hr. ago particular fan of people who waste the company's money People like you . Gatekeepers. Oh no, don't waste the companies money, while they spend billions on buybacks. Reply Share Vote
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  • 27
    Coolbeanschilly. 10 hr. ago You should put a note in this person's file stating that whenever they are due for a computer replacement, they always get the oldest possible model from this point out. Reply Share Vote Trippynet OP. 5 hr. ago Unfortunately, when refreshing an old device, they always got given a brand new one (again, company policy). The "used but in warranty" stock was only for new hires and staff who had requested an in- life change of device type. Hence why they could sometimes st
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