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Dear Santa Claws, please ignore the times we "accidentally" pushed our hooman's mugs off the countertop, you know we had to train them and tough love is a part of the deal when you adopt a hooman. We'll need more money for a professional trainer, so an extra $20,000 would be appreciated. Thanks.
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As soon as you buy a whole bunch of the kind of food your cat supposedly likes, they all of a sudden don't like it anymore. Why do they do this? It's because cats always want what there isn't a lot of. That's why they want you to pet them when you're not paying attention to them. Just trick your cat into thinking there isn't a lot of food left, and then they'll be all over it!
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