'I'm too busy trying to be an adult': Mom kicks teenage son out for her boyfriend, asks son to move back in to take care of her after months of him being homeless

Author image for Emmy Pratt
Emmy Pratt • Senior Editor
Jan 28, 2024 6:00 PM EST

I've never understood parents who kick their children out the second they turn 18 or as soon as they graduate high school. If a kid really wants to spread their wings immediately after leaving school, then good for them, but I wouldn't say that most teenagers, even adult teenagers, are 100% to take on the world without any help just because they're technically adults. That doesn't mean I think that high school graduates should just be sitting around their parent's house contributing nothing to society just because they have free rent. They should go to college or work or do an apprenticeship or something to set themselves up for success without Mom and Dad. I'm willing to bet that most parents who kick their kids out when they're 18 aren't doing it because the kids are lazy. It's usually because they aren't willing to be parents beyond what's legally required of them. 

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  • 01
    r/AmltheAsshole u/Last_Astronaut_6032 • 21h AITA for not wanting to go back home to take care of my sick mom after her and her boyfriend kicked me out the day after my high school graduation last year?
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 02
    It was the day after graduation when my mom and her boyfriend told me that now that i was an adult, I had to move out and find a place of my own. Although it was unexpected,my mom and I's relationship changed drastically when her new boyfriend moved in. I tried to make a good impression because I wanted her to be happy but the guy just seemed to have an issue with me. He convinced my mom to start charging me rent because I had a part time job while still in school even though he was jobless and
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 03
    He would go in my room, go through my stuff and use some of my things without my permission. He even broke my laptop after using it without asking but my mom saw nothing wrong with his behaviour and always took his side. She would yell at me whenever I complained about how I didn't like him invading my privacy. He seemed very pleased with himself when my mom kicked me out.
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 04
    I didn't have enough to get a place so I survived by sleeping on friends couches as much as I could until they got tired of me and I had to sleep outside at times. Thankfully I was able to get a second job through someone I knew and I was able to save up and I just moved into a new place at the beginning of this month after months of not having anywhere to call home.
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 05
    A few days ago my mom's boyfriend reached out to me. Apparently my mom had a stroke and he tried guilting me into moving back to help her out because he got a job opportunity and has to move. I declined and told him that unfortunately I'm too busy trying to be an adult, it doesn't look like I can take time off that schedule to do that then hung up.
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 06
    YouthNAsia63 - 20h Prime Ministurd [458] It sucks when your mom gets to reap what she sowed. Your mom kicked you out. It's kinda hard to get over that. I'm sure your mom's BF will take care of her, though! (s) Even though he would have to take her with him when he moves for his great new job! NTA 5.5k
    via u/YouthNAsia63
  • 07
    Last_Astronaut_6032 OP. 20h It truly is hard to get over, I didn't expect my own mom to do that to me especially not over a guy she barely knew. It felt like I was dreaming. 43.1k ↓
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 08
    Ordinary Mortgage870 19h ● Your mom made it clear where her priorities are, and where yours should be. Don't feel guilty now that she's had a stroke. She should have made sure the guy she was banking on was actually a decent dude before leaving her own child out in the cold. ... 1.7k ↓ 4 1.7k
    via u/Ordinary_Mortgage870
  • 09
    Hoplite68 19h Partassipant [2] ● Don't move back, put bluntly she's shown she wouldn't do it for you. Don't treat people like family who don't treat you like family. Your mother's BF moved into what he saw as an almost perfect situation, only issue was you, so he got your mother to get rid of you. Now his perfect situation is blown up by your mother's health, so he's looking to dump her on someone else. Your mother brought this on herself, many times over, now the consequences of her reprehensib
    via u/Hoplite68
  • 10
    ● No-To-Newspeak • 17h Colo-rectal Surgeon [49] As a parent I simply cannot understand kicking out your child at 18. Both of mine left at 17 for university, and then moved on with their lives after graduation, but I would never have kicked them out if they had wanted to remain local. Also, I could never enter into a relationship with another person that would put my relationship with my children at risk. 4111
    via u/No-To-Newspeak
  • 11
    LeviathanLorb44 • 21h NTA. They threw you out of their lives because you weren't convenient for them. Now he's trying to bring you back in as a free home-care caretaker because that would be cheaper and convenient for him. Otherwise, he has to help her out. They were brutally callous to you, and it would still be the case if he didn't want free labor so he doesn't have to do it himself. ... 1.5k
    via u/LeviathanLorb44
  • 12
    ROaUdiamondGH • 19h Except he's not going to do it himself, he has this "new job" pop up at a convenient time to leave her behind ... 617
    via u/ROaUdiamond
  • 13
    _just_another_woman_ 19h ● If he's taken on caretaker responsibilities and leaves her without care, in many states he can be charged with abandonment... hence why he wants to foist that responsibility into OP, so he's free to move. NTA OP, and as her next of kin, you are not legally required to do a thing for her, though people will try to tell you that you are. Let her rot in a medicaid nursing facility, at least she'll have a bed and a pillow which is more than she did for you. ... 4363
    via u/_just_another_woman_
  • 14
    Last_Astronaut_6032 OP • 18h I think so too, it just seems like an excuse to get away because he probably feels like he didn't sign up for this. I am not surprised though, he is a piece of work. 207
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 15
    StormyMcGee68 - 20h Aficionado [17] NTA he just wants you to take the responsibility because he can't mooch any longer. 895
    via u/StormyMcGee68
  • 16
    Last_Astronaut_6032 OP • 20h That's what it sounds like to me. ... 502
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 17
    No-Comfortable-3918 20h NTA, but how on earth did you not go NC with them and block them? I'm surprised he even has your contact info given your description of him. 258
    via u/No-Comfortable-3918
  • 18
    Last_Astronaut_6032 OP. 20h I guess I was just so focused on surviving that I didn't even think of blocking them. I honestly also had a bit of hope in the beginning that maybe she would change her mind and tell me that I could come back but she never did. They haven't contacted me ever until now. 383
    via u/Last_Astronaut_6032
  • 19
    Generaless. 19h That's wild that your own mother couldn't be bothered to call you but especially after kicking you out and making you pay rent when you were still in high school, she is just evil. Obviously NTA. I would block her. 169
    via u/Generaless
  • 20
    Superb-Chicken-8813 • 20h NTA. Have you been able to confirm from a third party that your Mom HAD a stroke? Could be a ploy from the boyfriend. And even if your Mom had a stroke, your obligation to her ended when she chose to kick you out. 195
    via u/Superb-Chicken-8813
  • 21
    Routine-Pea-9538-16h Sadly, it's well known that men leave their wives when their wives get sick. He has no new job opportunity that he needs to move for, he just doesn't want to take care of her. Hopefully OP sees through this and focuses on her needs. 453
    via u/Routine-Pea-9538

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boyfriend family drama kid mother homeless reddit story parenting family reddit thread Reddit mom Parenting Fail son parents Parenting FAILS
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