'So NOW he wants to benefit from your hobby?': Food influencer's hater boyfriend wants in on her free food but won't stop hating

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Feb 1, 2024 3:00 PM EST

Influencers. Whether you like them or not, they're here to stay, and they're all around us. I feel like everyone is an influencer nowadays. I'm surrounded by niche internet micro-celebrities and I hate it. Everyone has a brand, everyone has a take, and everyone is taking pictures all the time. 

But, I would never discourage my friend, let alone a significant other, from chasing their dreams. If you want to be an Instagram star, go for it. I'll be there holding your ring light. Especially if you want to be a food influencer. I love trying new restaurants and new foods, and I'd be honored if you'd take me with you. And maybe I'll get something for free. The boyfriend of a food influencer had the same idea but unfortunately couldn't quell his haterade enough to pull it off. If you're going to be a hater, go on and hate, but realize it has consequences!

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  • 01
    r/AmltheAsshole u/ChelseaCheesy • 4d AITA for not sharing a free meal with my anti-Instagram boyfriend? Not the
    via u/ChelseaCheesy
  • 02
    I post my food pics from when I go out to eat on Instagram. It's just for fun, I spend like 30 minutes a week on it, tops. My boyfriend is a very sweet guy in many ways, but one thing that I'm not so much a fan of is that he often hops on the bandwagon of hating on innocent things. Not just not liking something, but making sure everyone knows he doesn't like it even if nobody asked. I can't help but notice a theme: Pumpkin spice lattes, pouty selfies, Taylor Swift, etc. As you can guess, he is n
    via u/ChelseaCheesy
  • 03
    Even though I don't have very many followers, I have started getting occasional offers and invitations from restaurants in my city to try their food for free in exchange for a review. Nothing crazy-no steak dinners so far-but I've gotten a few sandwiches and several baked goods.
    via u/ChelseaCheesy
  • 04
    Well, I just hit the big leagues and got invited to a new restaurant opening that includes a free appetizer and entree for me and one guest. I immediately invited one of my Instagram friends who I have gone out to eat with on several occasions and who also enjoys taking food photos. I told my boyfriend and he's I that I'm not taking him and says I'm doing it out of spite-I really think I'm not? If the restaurant is giving me free food in exchange for a post, I'm gonna put more effort into the po
    via u/ChelseaCheesy
  • 05
    Choice_Mongoose2427 • 4d Aficionado [13] Your gut feeling about this is absolutely correct. You're there to do a job essentially and his bad attitude would be a hindrance to you getting it done right. NTA. I want to also gently point out, as a married woman of 21 years, that for a relationship to work and be healthy and happy, your partner needs to be supportive of the things you're excited about. They don't have to be interested themselves, but they do need to encourage and lift you up. Your bo
    via u/Choice_Mongoose2427
  • 06
    A person's character is their playbook. It dictates every move we make and defines who we are. The person you're describing takes joy in robbing other people of theirs. You're not the only person he does this to, as you've said. He is also someone who feels entitled to the spoils of other people's successes after putting a lot of energy into knocking them down a peg with his disparagement. This is his character. I hope you see that. This isn't the behavior of a sweet guy. It's mean spirited, pet
    via u/Choice_Mongoose2427
  • 07
    adventures of Violet • 4d Certified Proctologist [20] NTA, your boyfriend sounds rather exhausting with his I'm cooler than everybody because I hate popular things attitude. Go and have fun with someone who isn't a sourpuss. Enjoy your dinner!
    via u/adventuresofViolet
  • 08
    Turbulent_Bus6256. 4d Also the list of popular things he shows contempt for (pumpkin spice lattes, a selfie pose, and Instagram food pics) are mostly associated with women. The whole trend of mocking popular female interests needs to die.
    via u/Turbulent_Bus6256
  • 09
    caponemalone2020 • 4d To gently point out, the things he actively hates are all associated with women. No, he doesn't have to like it at all, but actively hating is a part of misogyny. I don't think this is a good guy.
    via u/caponemalone2020
  • 10
    Natural Forty • 4d Aficionado [10] INFO: If you told your bf that he could come as long as he was respectful of the work you're doing to pay for his meal, what do you think would happen?
    via u/NaturalForty
  • 11
    ChelseaCheesy OP. 4d I'm not sure, but even if he was I would still rather invite my friend for this particular meal just because it's related to our shared interest.
    via u/ChelseaCheesy
  • 12
    ΝΤΑ Location Academic1731 • 4d flag. Not because he doesn't like something, it means he has to give you a hard time about it. There are plenty of things I like and my spouse doesn't - inverse applies too - and we just let the other one do what makes them happy. I am concerned this is just the tip of the iceberg. Take your friend and have a great time! You didn't do anything wrong.
    via u/LocationAcademic1731
  • 13
    TheHobbyWaitress • 4d Aficionado [16] ΝΤΑ The restaurant is doing you a favor with the invite. So, you're doing them a favor by bringing another IG foodie. Maybe he should stop rolling his eyes at your hobby.
    via u/TheHobbyWaitress
  • 14
    SOAD_Lover69. 4d So NOW he wants to benefit from your hobby? him. Btw probably see this post as it 100% sounds like he's a redditor based on his mindless hate for harmless things many women enjoy.
    via u/SOAD_Lover69
  • 15
    pedestrianwanderlust • 4d NTA. Good decision taking a colleague who appreciates the opportunity. It's astute you notice his lack of support and act accordingly. Any partner that thinks your work, hobby or passion is disdainful or dumb is a red flag. It shows a lack of respect for you. It is possible he doesn't understand it and just needs converted but given that he is proud of his negative view on many things to all people, I suspect he's not teachable. So no he doesn't get to benefit from the
    via u/pedestrianwanderlust
  • 16
    unrepentantbanshee . 4d "he often hops on the bandwagon of hating on innocent things [...] I can't help but notice a theme: Pumpkin spice lattes, pouty selfies, Taylor Swift, etc." Your boyfriend doesn't like women. If he was an all-around buzzkill who can't let people enjoy things when it doesn't affect him, that'd be bad enough - but you said it yourself, there's a theme in his disgust and it's "things we consider feminine interests". He looks down on things that women like and mocks them.
    via u/unrepentantbanshee
  • 17
    Existing_Fox_6317 · 4d Partassipant [4] NTA. I guess I am like your bf in my relationship in that my partner posts everything on social media, while I'm more private and have no interest in all of his friends having a play-by-play of our lives. I worry that it's not good for his mental health and also consider it a huge waste of time. But guess what? He enjoys it and I love him so I deal with it. I have a few guidelines that he agrees to respect, like not posting about me or pics of me without m
    via u/Existing_Fox_6317

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