30 Witty Conversations Capturing the Trials and Errors of Modern Dating

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  • 01
    ... AT&T LTE Done 3:42 PM James, 33 8 miles away Active 9 minutes ago 1 75% X About James I like long walks on the beach with my girlfriend, until the LSD wears off and I realize I'm just dragging a stolen mannequin around a Wendy's parking lot.
  • 02
    $ < Cee O Cee, 24 20 miles away Active 8 hours ago "A truly amazing girl." -The NYTimes "One of this generation's most brilliant minds." -Mensa International "Funniest person I know!" -Louis CK хо: "This chick could kick my in a heartbeat." -Chuck Norris "By far my favorite grandkid!" -My Grandma 15% 7:10 "AAARARRRGWWWH!!!" -Chewbacca
  • 03
    oooo Verizon LTE ← 4:08 PM A Lexus? Message Alexis Sep 21, 2015, 6:25 PM Sep 22, 2015, 2:35 PM 1 0 81% If you were a car, guess what you'd be? Wow I just read your bio hahaha Sep 22, 2015, 3:41 PM No. A 1998 Windstar because I want you to carry all my children. Send
  • 04
    76 * Autumn 76% 11:28 We should hang out on Sept 22nd at 9:21 AM I believe that's when Autumn comes? GIF Send a message... 3 hours ago
  • 05
    < Carin Messages About Are you from Heaven? Because you look like me dead wife. Her passing haunts me to this day. Omg hahah 12 hr. ago Hahaha wow you're right I'm so insensitive 1 hr. ago 42:29 you know what? you're totally right. I should just try to see the humor in it, then I'll be able to finally move on 12 hr. ago GIF Send a message... O 2 days ago VENDER V
  • 06
    ...oo AT&T Message 123 Me hitler and me again 9:30 AM Marwa YOU MATCHED WITH MARWA ON 1/6/16 O one marry one kill one you. Z X Q W ERT YU | O P 184% hitler, marry you, then kill ASD F GH J KL CVBN Send space M X return
  • 07
    Fiona Messages About Hi 1 hr. ago What's up lol 39 min. ago What Now Oh you know, just having a tickle fight with my grandpa! What's your favorite GIF Send a message... O 8:29 HEY 1 hr. ago position? 30 min. ago ●●● A
  • 08
    TELUS Sophie Messages About YOU MATCHED WITH SOPHIE ON 11/24/15. I think your name is missing an n Mon 12:37 Becuase you Sophine you blow my mind Mon 12:38 That made my day 13:30 I can make your tomorrow too Now I can also make your hole weak Now 14:34 Send a message ●●●
  • 09
    ... Verizon LTE Guess 9:02 PM Liz YOU MATCHED WITH LIZ ON 1/20/16 Message 1 35% What's Liz short for? Ummm... Close try again The Lizard King? Disney's The Lizard King? Nopes I'm out of guesses Send
  • 10
    Jehnae Messages About -733 ( YOU MATCHED WITH JEHNAE ON 9/21/15. Aug 3 10:44 PM 13% اس Can I have your number Aug 3 10:07 PM It's up to you Aug 4 12:16 AM Send a message 9:40 PM Thanks. You want me to text you? Aug 3 11:04 PM I'm not going to Aug 4 1:08 AM
  • 11
    ...o T-Mobile LTE GIF Hi :) 9:58 AM YOU MATCHED WITH KOI ON 8/3/16 Koi Extremely often Aug 4, 2016, 10:01 PM How often do people make fish jokes with your name? Type a Message... * E 71% Aug 4, 2016, 11:22 PM Well at least they aren't koi about it. Sent Send
  • 12
    A < Mariah Messages About The Santa Maria was one of the ships Columbus sailed to America. If you're anything like him, you probably want to own slaves. Can I be your first? GIF Send a message... O 2:05 11 min. ago
  • 13
    oooo Telstra ← Leave? YOU MATCHED WITH SHANNON ON 27/10/2015 12:05 AM with? Shannon Message Oh one It better be good what did you come up What do trees say? 21% I didn't think of that That actually made me laugh You're funny I don't know I'm stumped Send
  • 14
    Cayla Messages About I see you're going for biomedical engineering. I have some ideas for you. Two words: Cyborg Message me back so we can get to work. Thought about it, let's get to work Cayla 11 min. ago GIF Send a message... 6:34 Alright, first I'm gonna need a mold. O 56 min. ago Sent
  • 15
    Melanie If I had 12 cantaloupes, labeled A through L, My favourite one is hard to pick, The best one hard to tell. So I would inspect and check them out, To pick the best for me, And after I had checked them all, I would pick Melon E. 2:39 GIF Send a message... 5 min. ago
  • 16
    GIF Are you a SAT? Because I'd do you for 3 hours and 45 minutes. With only a water break. Tony 24 min. ago I'm more like a driver's test. Your enthusiasm to take me is adorable but you're most likely sixteen and don't know what you're doing. Send a message... Sent
  • 17
    AT&T < 4 100% 9:33 AM Laura Messages About Laura, 21 10 miles away Active 28 minutes ago boy u must be my GPA because i know i could do better i'm just too lazy to actually try
  • 18
    Amanda What's up:) Amanda 3 December 2015 In bed watching friends no 100% ال... Just doing an assignment that I put off for school haha, you? Amanda 3 December 2015 Amanda 6 hours ago Hey! You still watching friends? GIF Send a message... 7:36 am 3 December 2015 19 August Thought I'd ask Sent ●●●
  • 19
    < Shandy Messages About Hey :) Shandy 37 min. ago How are you? Shandy 17 min. ago UGE5% 1:35 AM Hello €: GIF Send a message... 35 min. ago Meh I'm doing alright. How are you? Did Sean Connery try to name you Sandy? Sent ●●● A
  • 20
    <Messages < GIF 0000 Sure. Yes. Oct 6, 2016, 1:19 PM 8:33 PM Oct 6, 2016, 2:11 PM Are you a Harry Potter fan? Oct 6, 2016, 2:37 PM Alright what's Harry's favorite way of getting down a hill? Oct 6, 2016, 7:06 PM I don't know. Oct 6, 2016, 7:31 PM Oct 6, 2016, 8:32 PM 12% I don't get it...? Type a Message... Walking JK ROLLING Sent Send
  • 21
    GIF 16° Messages About Now N☎ 51%■ 7:20 pm Hey neat I accidentally superlike people too! So much in common 9 mins ago Omg how did you know it was an accident hahaha It's the first of many accidents we could share. Send a message... Now A
  • 22
    19 GIF Roo Messages About I could drink more wine than you and beat you up. 20 hr. ago Yeah, well I can eat more Xanax and beat up your dog Not if I slit your throat first. 1 hr. ago Send a message... O 8:03 4 hr. ago A
  • 23
    oooo Verizon ← 3:26 PM Travis Oct 29, 2014, 3:15 PM Hey what's up Message 10 35% What's it like being a truck? What do you mean? I'm not a truck lol Profile pictures don't lie. Lol I have other pics than my truck lol but I do love my truck That's what a truck would say. Send
  • 24
    Taylor Messages About Guess how many thumbtacks I can fit in my mouth GIF Send a message... O 5:54 Do you have Skype? April 17
  • 25
    GIF Emma Messages About Hey Emma, what's the difference between jelly and jam The consistency? 1 min. ago Send a message... 7:44 3 min. ago oh okay, thanks! Now
  • 26
    NOLTE Kim Messages About No Now Why? Cause I'm so hot? 8 mins ago Umm ok 6 mins ago 37% Send a message 1:23 PM I just burnt myself. 13 mins ago No I was setting fire to old pictures of my father. 7 mins ago Want to hangout? 6 mins ago V
  • 27
    oooo AT&T? GIF LOL 5:09 PM Dear Your eyes remind me of the evening sky. My heart felt like broken glass until I saw you and then I felt like I had every Pokemon ever. I love how you play Zelda even when people think it's weird. If you gave me your phone number it would be my first ever victory. Love, Oct 12, 2016, 5:03 PM Ok you win 1 75% Type a Message... Sent Send
  • 28
    ...oo AT&T ? Done J.IcLaughlin 3:25 PM Hope, 19 20 miles away Active 3 days ago The p is silent at night X 74%
  • 29
    Alan, 19 The University of Auckland WHY YOU SHOULD SWIPE RIGHT. A PRESENTATION BY ALAN. See above for details (patrician music pls) X em
  • 30
    Mikey, 21 18 miles away we're a package deal

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