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No matter how cute his meows are, don't believe them! He is a master manipulator, and expert at psychological warfare and interrogation. We know it's hard, but you must resist. He may even offer you love, but don't give him food in return. We know this is an impossible challenge.
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We are so jealous of these cats. We're more jealous than we should be over cats. Actually, now that we think about it, we're almost always jealous of cats. No work, no school, no responsibilities - just meow meow.
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