'He demanded I 'toss it all in boxes' but he didn't tell me to be gentle': Woman empowers herself by haphazardly returning her lazy ex's belongings

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    I hung up on him and proceeded to enjoy my celebratory glass of wine that evening hoping that he was enjoying the shattered remains.
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    Posted by u/MrsKnockers81 When my ex learned to not ask me to do anything for him any more M OC A bit of a back story: I divorced my ex a little over 9 years ago after 14 years of marriage. I won't go into the specifics as to
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    why, but suffice it to say he was a lying, cheating . Early on during the marriage I tended to not be all that assertive until I finally had my fill and grew a backbone. He hated that. He did not like hearing the word "no" from me or in doing things my own way.
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    So fast forward to a month after we were officially divorced. He was in his new place and I was in my house (formerly the house we shared) with our sons, but he still had a ton of his stuff there. Stuff I didn't want even though I paid for a lot of it, but stuff I knew he really wanted. He finally reached
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    out and demanded, not asked, demanded I send him his stuff. Just toss it all in boxes and send it over to him. (His exact words.) Mind you he was only about 10 miles away from me at that point and could've easily come over to do it himself. He didn't want to do that because he'd have to see me. Something he was actively trying not to do. Cue the MC.
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    Now a lot of what he had were collectibles. No details, but some of it was fairly expensive and fragile. So I did as he asked. Correction, demanded. I tossed it all into numerous boxes. Now some of the truly expensive items, I did take great care in packing them, only
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    because I knew my sons would probably eventually want them. But for the stuff I knew my ex really wanted and care a lot about, nah. I just tossed it all in a box without a care in the world. Now I did inspect everything and, while I just
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    dumped them in boxes, nothing was damaged by me. I also took pictures of it to prove it. So once I closed them all up, I told him to either to get his over to pick it up or get someone to do it for him. He got someone to do it.
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    Now I was not at the house when this person picked everything up, but my sons and sister were. They did not know how everything was packed. They only showed him the boxes. They told me that the person who picked up the boxes quite literally just tossed them into the back of his pick-up without a care in the world and then sped away.
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    for Later that night I got a call from my ex who started calling me a destroying all his stuff. I told him that everything was fine before I closed the boxes up and I had proof of it. I then said that maybe next time be a bit nicer to me when making "requests" and reminded him he demanded I that I "toss it all in boxes", but he didn't tell me to be gentle in doing so.
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    I hung up on him and proceeded to enjoy my celebratory glass of wine that evening hoping that he was enjoying the shattered remains.
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    shadow-foxe .22 hr. ago If he had bothered to go over and get his own stuff, this would not have happened. Nor did he even tell this person what was in the boxes and to be gentle..LOL
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    TicoSoon 1 day ago Ah, the bliss of seeing a FAFO come to its joyful and righteous fruition. My friend, you have the respect and admiration of all of us. Well done.
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    dragonchilde 7 hr. ago Now this is a truly malicious compliance. Spirit ignored, letter conformed. :) Well done!
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    MadamePoule Montreal 6 hr. ago. edited 6 hr. ago Spirit conformed too. Ex's spirit was that this was a low-effort request and that OP could easily just do it without thought. If Ex had acknowledged they were asking OP for a lot of work- acknowledged to themselves and to OP-the interaction would have gone quite differently.
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    Since the spirit and the letter were both that this was a low-effort request, OP put in low effort. What Ex secretly wanted was for OP to be a saintly mind reader and to voluntarily put in a large amount of effort that would never need to be acknowledged. It's very possible that
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    the marriage had involved lots of Ex secretly wanting things and not communicating them directly, and lots of OP accommodating them without acknowledgement. Now that they are no longer married, OP no longer needs to play that toxic game. Secret desires aside, the spirit of the request was that OP would not be putting much effort in. So they didn't.
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    Penguin_Joy . 17 hr. ago What Ex secretly wanted was for OP to be a saintly mind reader and to voluntarily put in a large amount of effort that would never need to be acknowledged. A man never takes a woman for granted more than he does when he's divorcing her
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    Creative-Sun6739 23 hr. ago Did you put your feet up while sipping that wine? I know you did. I would have too. Vote Reply Share MrsKnockers81 OP 23 hr. ago Mayyyyyybe.
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    Witty_Commentator 13 hr. ago The ex sounds like the kind of person that doesn't change how they treat people, they just change who they're doing it to. Chances are, he demanded they go get his stuff, and they were none too thrilled about it, either!
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    Wiechu 22 hr. ago As a dude i totally support this. There is this thing 'could you please' and although I'm Polish and my GF literally admitted she uses a filter on me being blunt, I would rather use the 'pretty please' in this situation.
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    PatchworkRaccoon314 20 hr. ago One imagines that whoever he probably demanded to bring his stuff over in the back of his pickup truck, had a similar devil-may-care attitude regarding their contents. This MC was made possible by the wordless agreement between the two of you; if he had transported the boxes with the utmost care, nothing would have been damaged.
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    McDuchess 7 hr. ago There are some really bitter man living in his mother's basement vibes going on in this comment thread. Vote Reply Share ... MrsKnockers81 OP 7 hr. ago LOL! Nailed it
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    VapoursAndSpleen. 19 hr. ago I told my ex that I put all of his in the driveway and "tomorrow is dump day" (dump day was the day where the trash company will take whatever huge pile of stuff you put out there). About a half hour later, his car screeched into the driveway and he packed the trunk and three seats in the car and screeched back out. Byeeee!

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