The Wildest Parenting Texts of the Week (April 23, 2024)

When I think of the ultimate parenting failure, I think of Billy Bigelow. He is the protagonist (and antagonist) of the musical Carousel, and ding dong, does he have high highs and low lows. He finds out his wife (whom he constantly mistreats) is pregnant, steals money to provide for his future child, and ends his own life when he gets caught. He is allowed to come back to earth 15 years later for the chance to redeem his soul, and while there, he can't even interact with his now teenage daughter without slapping her, too! He is finally allowed heavenly redemption after he tells his daughter that his misdeeds don't define her, but I'm not sure if that, or his love for her mother, really makes up for what he did. If you're more interested in parenting fails that are less defined by heavenly mandates, you've come to the right place.

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