'I don't feel like working today': 20+ hilariously lame reasons why people called in sick to work

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    SANCING WITH
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    What's the most ridiculous reason you've heard for someone calling out of work?
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    medicwitha45. 2 days ago Guy got into my lunch, without asking, and ended going to the hospital because his mouth was on fire and his stomach hurt. HR then tried to get on my about poisoning my food or pranking people. It wasn't a prank, it was homemade Thai basil with rat peppers and some smoked Naga jolokias. I'm a pepperhead - I grow an assortment of super hots, and collect crazy sauces. He ended up getting canned for trying to make it a workers comp claim.
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    samtresler 2 days ago A guy I hired by the day once told me at his old job he was told he could not be late again. So, or course he was running late. He claims to have looked his boss in the eye and said, "Have you ever taken a Iso bad that you had to get back in the shower?" Apparently, it worked and he wasn't fired that day.
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    slophiewal 2 days ago I used to work with a woman probably aged about 55 and she was notoriously very ditzy and daft, and just a bit of a laughing stock. Anyway we started at about 9am and she never turned up. She rang at about 11am to say she was day dreaming and just aimlessly following the car infront of her and had driven like 100 miles away LMAO
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    Familiar_Physics_213. 2 days ago I have a good one. My employees were remote long before WFH was cool. My best girl calls and says she needs to log off for a while. Ok? ""Yeah, there's an alligator in my pool enclosure, and I can't concentrate. I'm waiting on Fish and Wildlife to get here to remove it." And then she emailed me a picture. Yeah girl, take all the time you need!
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    | Lacy435 2 days ago • Once had a guy call in sick. Two hours later he called in to say his basement had flooded, forgetting that he had already called in. In reality he was just really dr
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    • imbustyqueen · 2 days ago We had a "sick phone" at my office, basically a mobile/cell phone number you'd call. if noone answered you leave a voicemail.
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    So this voicemail gets left at about 1:30am on a saturday morning. Shift starts by 7am on saturdays. Club music PUMPING in background
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    YELLING INTO PHONE: Yeah ahh hey.. I won't be in tommorow, i'm not feeling too good, i think i'm coming down with a headache or something, been sick all night, i'll see you all on monday!!!
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    ZoeWalker83 2 days ago One time a colleague called in to say they couldn't come to work because apparently, they had been selected for an impromptu space mission orientation as a potential candidate for Mars colonization - said it was a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity and couldn't be missed. We all had a good chuckle, imagining him floating out there. Turned out he was just at a sci-fi convention and wanted to keep the theme going. He brought back some epic cosplay photos, so all was forgiven!
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    • pissclamato 2 days ago I once took a personal day because of my Pug. She's tiny, and fat, and snore-y, and it was winter and cold out, and my alarm went off, so she snuggled up to my face and neck, and just drifted off to sleep, snoring into my neck. I said " in. this" and called
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    I-Really-H-Fish 2 days ago She cleaned too much at home and felt that she shouldn't be expected to clean at work as well. Except she worked as a cleaner.
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    2LiveBoo 2 days ago • My husband's worker called in because he was trapped inside the office of a storage unit business. The owners didn't realise the dude was still there and locked up for the night. We got video documentation and everything. It was hilarious. Dude had to sleep on the office couch.
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    Hauntedtts 2 days ago First day: "Cat died, had to bury the cat." Second day: "Daughter too grieved over cat, have to take care of her." (Daughter is 28) Third Day: "Dog dug up cat, has to re-bury cat."
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    Stormandsunshine 2 days ago The person actually never called, but when we finally got a hold on her, she said she didn't show up because she woke up early and decided to bake bread so she couldn't come to work because she had to wait until they were finished. She said she could work in the afternoon instead, because she needed the money. Yeah, that's not how it works when you're a substitute teacher at a kindergarten.
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    Fafurion 2 days ago Travelling to Cancun for a family emergency.
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    JennyBJammin · 2 days ago My own most ridiculous reason was actually legit, but over a decade later I am still embarrassed lol. I had to call out because I got shampoo in my eyes, and the burning was so bad I couldn't open my eyes for longer than a second or two. I had to wear my gel eye mask pretty much the entire day. I was in my late 30s.
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    dylandbloom 2 days ago They said their car was snowed in and wouldn't start. They lived a block away.
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    • redpillallthewayy · 2 days ago Someone said they were so sunburnt they couldn't bend down to put underwear on
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    Cheetodude625 . 2 days ago Quoting my dad: "guy didn't show up to work at the refinery for a few days. Shows up later and says that he was kicked in the head by a poff dairy cow and was concussed for the time being."
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    Fast-Beat-7779 - 2 days ago Just straight up said "I don't feel like working today" 3803

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