The Setup (That You've Seen Before)
The premise sounds promising enough: a travel journalist boards a luxury cruise ship and witnesses what she believes is a murder in the cabin next door. But when she reports it, there's no body, no evidence, and everyone thinks she's crazy or lying.
Classic paranoid thriller setup. Woman sees something. No one believes her. Is she right, or is she losing it?
If you've seen a thriller made in the last 30 years, you already know exactly how this plays out. And I mean EXACTLY.
I Figured It Out In Twenty Minutes
Here's my problem: I'm not some genius mystery solver. I don't usually guess whodunits. I'm perfectly happy being surprised by twists.
But I figured out this entire movie in the first twenty minutes. The "mystery." The motive. All of it.
And then I had to sit through another hour-plus of the protagonist slowly catching up to where I already was, watching her make decisions that made no sense, and waiting for the inevitable reveal that I'd already pieced together before the opening credits finished.
That's not a thriller. That's tedium with background music.
Characters Who Apparently Can't See Faces
One of the film's biggest problems - and critics have been rightfully dragging this - is that characters seem to be face-blind and brain-dead.
Without spoiling specifics, there are moments where people should absolutely recognize other people. Where obvious connections should be made. Where basic pattern recognition would solve the entire mystery.
But everyone just doesn't notice. Doesn't connect dots. Doesn't use their eyes or brains.
It's characters being deliberately stupid so the plot can continue existing.
Maybe This Works For Twelve-Year-Olds?
Look, I'm trying to be fair here. Maybe if you're twelve and haven't seen dozens of thrillers before, this might feel fresh. Maybe if this is your first "woman witnesses murder on a boat" movie, you won't see every beat coming.
But for anyone who's watched more than three psychological thrillers in their life, this is paint-by-numbers storytelling with zero surprises.
The twists aren't twisty. The tension isn't tense. The thriller doesn't thrill.
It's a movie going through the motions of being a thriller without understanding what actually makes the genre work.
The Darkness Problem
Here's another complaint that's showing up repeatedly: the movie is shot so dark you literally can't see what's happening half the time.
I get it - a luxury cruise at night, with a moody atmosphere that creates unease through shadows. But when your thriller requires the audience to squint to see basic plot-relevant details, you've miscalculated. I mean, I thought my multifocal glasses needed a new prescription.
A thriller needs clarity. We need to see what the protagonist sees, understand what she's reacting to, and follow the visual clues. Instead, we're just staring at darkness, hoping something important isn't happening in the shadows we can't penetrate.
Boring Is The Worst Sin A Thriller Can Commit
Murder mysteries can be convoluted. They can be implausible. They can have ridiculous twists. Sometimes those things even work in the movie's favor - they're memorable, discussable, fun to pick apart.
But boring? Boring is unforgivable.
A thriller's entire job is to keep you engaged, guessing, on edge. It should make 90 minutes feel like 60. It should have you so wrapped up that you forget to check your phone.
The Woman in Cabin 10 made 92 minutes feel like three hours. I checked the timestamp multiple times. I considered pausing to do literally anything else. The tedium became suffocating.
One review said it felt like being held hostage by a movie, and honestly? Perfect description.
What Others Are Saying
I'm not alone in this assessment. The critical response has been brutal. We're talking sub-30% ratings. Words like "pedestrian," "plodding," "predictable," and "absolute tosh" are being thrown around.
People who read the source material say it butchered the book. People who didn't read the book say it's just a bad thriller. Everyone seems to agree it's a mess.
The final act, which should deliver payoff and resolution, apparently becomes "ludicrous" - though I'd argue the entire film operates at that level, so at least it's consistent.
The Verdict
The Woman in Cabin 10 isn't offensively bad. It's not aggressively terrible. It's just boring, predictable, and utterly forgettable.
It's the kind of movie you put on because you're scrolling Netflix and the thumbnail looks okay, and then you regret your choice about fifteen minutes in, but commit anyway because you've already invested time.
Don't make my mistake.
If you want a good thriller about a woman witnessing something suspicious on a boat, rewatch literally any other thriller with that premise. They're probably all better than this.
If you have standards and actually want to be surprised, engaged, or thrilled by your thriller, skip this entirely.
And if you're twelve and haven't seen every possible variation of this plot? I guess give it a shot. You might enjoy it.
For everyone else: those 92 minutes are gone forever, and I'm still annoyed about it.