If you are a purveyor of the personals, than you may already be privy to these lessons. If not, follow our advice and avoid these common pitfalls.
1
Don't Look for a New Place to Live
How Is this career expanding? What does that even mean? And 50 something for 20 something...icky.
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2
Never Try to Negotiate Dinner Via Personals Ad
Ever wonder what a breakup looks like? This. This is what it looks like.
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3
Don't Admit to Having to Pay With a Piggy Bank
The cashier would have to be pretty cool to accept a piggy bank full of change to pay for some cheeseburgers.
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4
Don't Talk About Having Brain Surgery
What the hell noise could you be making? Honestly, what the hell is this person talking about?
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5
Sometimes You Can Reveal too Much About Your Personality
Yeah, I'm not sure what to say about this.
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6
It's Good to Keep a Theme
Don't go from holding hands to skinny dipping. You don't get to sneak that in there. Stick with watching movies or gazing into another's eyes. Or if you do use skinny dipping, don't follow it with horse back riding. THIS DOES NOT COMPUTE.
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7
Avoid the Phrase "You Might Be My Type"
I understand you're trying to be hopeful and cheery, but really all your saying is "I was super dizzy, and I don't remember much about you." And that's not going to have the ladies knocking at your door.