'You have much larger issues to deal with': Oblivious 37-year-old husband wants buxom Bratz-style pinup girl tattoo, doesn't understand why wife is upset

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JR Atkinson • Writer and Editor
Sep 2, 2024 8:00 PM EDT

Tattoos are, for better or for worse, forever. It's not uncommon to end up with a tattoo you regret, and it's not the end of the world. When we're young and our brains are squishy, we're bound to make some decisions that we didn't fully think through. And tattoos are so common now, especially for millennials and Gen Z, that most people don't bat an eyelash if you have one. 

But as you get older, your judgement should ideally improve. Your brain is fully formed so you're probably less likely to get a Tweety Bird on your buttocks or an arm tat that says "Ball is life." But not everyone gets blessed with tattoo maturity. One woman found that out the hard way, when her husband came to her with a tattoo concept that seemed like a bad idea, for a lot of reasons. Read on for the details and see if her response was justified. 

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    Cheezburger Image 10396808704
    via Maixent Viau
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    AITAH for wanting a tattoo of a woman that doesn't look like my wife??
    via u/StoreNo6348
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    I (37M) want to get several tattoos on my arm, including a tattoo of a sort of pinup girl, but in a more modern style. I found an artist online whose aesthetic I really like, and made note of some pictures of goth-looking girls with Bratz face features. I showed them to my wife to see what she thinks, and
    via u/StoreNo6348
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    she got upset that none of them look like her. I didn't think that was a big deal, a pinup tattoo isn't necessarily meant to look like your SO, but she seemed extremely hurt by it, asking me how I would feel if she got a tattoo of some guy that didn't look like me. I told her I wouldn't mind, and she didn't like. that response. So AITAH for wanting this tattoo, or is it really common practice for a tattoo to look like your SO?
    via u/StoreNo6348
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    IrrelevantManatee • 4h ago . Soft YTA. I understand that it's "Your body, your choice"... but you are getting a tattoo of a pin up chick you find attractive on your arm that looks nothing like your wife.
    via u/IrrelevantManatee
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    How would you feel if your wife told you that she loves some other man's body and face so much she would get it tattooed on her very visible arm so she can always look at it whenever and parade it around to show to her friend?
    via u/IrrelevantManatee
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    lihzee 4h ago . I think a Bratz-esque pinup girl sounds really odd for a 37 year old man, but I may just be having a hard time envisioning it.
    via u/lihzee
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    Mindless... • . 4h ago Edited 3h ago Soft YTA just because it doesn't sound like you even tried to understand her perspective. From her perspective you are having your ideal beauty tattooed on you because it's a very sexualized pin up girl. Every time she sees your arm she's going to be reminded that she is not your ideal type or beauty. And every time you interact with a girl who looks like that she's going to be thinking about how you maybe wish you'd married them instead.
    via u/Mindless-Donut8906
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    Is it rational? No probably not. But this isn't just getting a tattoo this is having a tattoo on your body that is going to consistently remind her how you don't think she's the ideal girl. Every time you snuggle, wrap your arms around her, or have She's going to see your arm and be insecure. And you want to do it anyway.
    via u/Mindless-Donut8906
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    bakingfriands • 3h ago "It doesn't look like me" is code for "please don't get a woman tattooed on your body, especially not one with a child's doll face". She is trying to spare your feelings and not have to look at that for the rest of her life.
    via u/bakingfriands
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    pizzaduh . 3h ago A BRATZ doll themed pinup? Dude, you have much larger issues to deal with.
    via u/pizzaduh
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    thewineyourewith . 3h ago YTA for the innocent act. Most women would have a problem with their husband tattooing. child-looking women onto his body. It's creepy af. You know very well why she's uncomfortable. You know it isn't because these child-women don't have her face. Coming to Reddit to get some weird, but it's your body!, validation is also an ah move.
    via u/thewineyourewith
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    GoodThis3501 · 3h ago You don't find the idea of a pinup tattoo with a body and a child's face like, incredibly creepy and weird? A half-dressed child with permanently on your arm? Because you think she's super hot?
    via u/GoodThis3501
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    AuspicaDarkmagic • 4h ago Yep YTA "Hi Honey, I want to get - a tattoo of a woman I find attractive on my body, not you though."
    via u/AuspicaDarkmagic
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    • Away-Understanding34 3h ago I would say YTA. It's not like you already had this when you met your wife. You are actively trying to get another woman's face and figure permanently put on your body. It's like saying your wife isn't good enough or pretty/ enough for you. She will now have
    via u/Away-Understanding34
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    to look at this for the rest of the relationship and it's going to eat away at her that you prefer that type of woman. Seriously, maybe it's not a big deal to you but it is messing with her. Although, if she went on and on about preferring another man, I think you would have a problem with it. That's basically what you are doing here.
    via u/Away-Understanding34
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    canyonemoon • 4h ago YTA in the sense that is this really the hill you want to die on? Your body, your tattoos, but you really want a physical reminder of hurting your wife? I don't know, I think it's just about picking and choosing your battles, and I don't understand wanting something that hurts your significant other.
    via u/canyonemoon
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    • Tricky-Librarian-872 3h ago Yta Imagine your wife found some stud on Instagram and wanted to put his picture on her phone Screensaver. Not you, but him. Now Imagine she wants him permanently embedded in her... aka a tattoo. You're absolutely in the wrong.
    via u/Tricky-Librarian-872
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    TinyDaggerr • 3h ago So i assume you're getting this tattoo of a "pin up girl" and they're based on the type of woman you find attractive- right? So that's why your wife is upset they look nothing like her. And presumably your preferences come from what? Women you like to look at...for what? Yeah- kind of YTA.
    via u/TinyDaggerr
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    SgtMartin Riggs • 3h ago Like you say, it's just a work of art, but personally I wouldn't hang up a painting my wife doesn't like in our home. It's your body, but if the tattoo upsets her, idk I think that's a fair reason to not get it. She has to look at it for the rest of your life too.
    via u/SgtMartinRiggs

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