Woman Calls It Quits on Thanksgiving Dinner When Hostile Mother-In-Law Uninvites Her Family From the Celebration, Decides To Start a New, Drama-Free Tradition

Author image for Lana DeGaetano
Lana DeGaetano • "Show me to me please."
Nov 27, 2024 10:00 PM EST

When it comes to Thanksgiving, there's no telling what kind of arguments might take place. When extended family and immediate family are all stuffed into one normal-sized dining room, that's a sure-fire recipe for disaster. There are definitely pros and cons to Thanksgiving with your in-laws, but one petty mother-in-law might be the largest con and the only push you need to stop showing up to their traditional Thanksgiving family dinner.

Many MILs think that they can walk all over their sons' wives because let's be real: Nobody wants animosity with their husband's mama. You wouldn't catch me entertaining a screaming fight with mine. It gets to a point, though, when you're no longer happy being in the same room as your MIL. The animosity turns into repeated offenses on your character, your family, and your happiness. The woman in this next story decides to choose herself and her family for once—rewriting her long-standing track record of negative Thanksgivings.

Add as a preferred
source on Google
Advertisement
  • 01
    to him. It just feels so manipulative and cowardly. I felt really justified in putting my foot down and saying, "No, you made your bed, now lay in it."
    via Unsplash+ (Kateryna Hliznitsova)

    This image is for illustration only, and the subjects are models; the image does not depict the actual subjects of the story.

  • 02
    AITAH for ditching my MIL on Thanksgiving?
    via roseypaige
  • 03
    My mother-in-law has been ruining Thanksgiving for me for years and somehow she makes it more complicated every year. It started out with her just being overly stressed about hosting and she
    via roseypaige
  • 04
    would snap at everyone and just make the whole atmosphere uncomfortable, but I always tried to be helpful and understanding. I mean, hosting IS stressful right? Then one year I walked in on her smack-
    via roseypaige
  • 05
    talking the dessert I had brought to my SIL and it hit me hard. Thanksgiving has never been the same for me since. In recent years, other people in the family have voiced their opinions about her antics, so at least I felt less alone in it.
    via roseypaige
  • 06
    One year, she passive aggressively announced to everyone in a group text that since it was very expensive, she would. need us to all split up the dishes and bring something (as if we weren't already doing
    via roseypaige
  • 07
    that for years to begin with). She would often assign my husband and me things that she knew we "couldn't mess up" (mind you, I cook for my family literally everyday with zero complaints) like
    via roseypaige
  • 08
    "bring pepperoni and cheese and crackers" (I designed a massive Charcuterie board that year just to prove that I was capable of more than just "bringing pepperoni and cheese"). The following year, she texted
    via roseypaige
  • 09
    us that in addition to splitting up the menu, she would be purchasing all of the ingredients for us, instructed us to Venmo her our share, and she would drop them off with her preferred dishes that she would like them
    via roseypaige
  • 10
    served in. The worst part is that, while she had assigned Sweet Potato Casserole to me because she doesn't like it, she didn't even drop off fresh ingredients (1/2 bag of stale marshmallows from her pantry and a can of
    via roseypaige
  • 11
    yams) or the right ingredients (or right size dishes) and in addition to Venmo'ing her I still needed to go out and buy the ingredients for my dish. Last year, was particularly stressful with them, in
    via roseypaige
  • 12
    general, as there was a lot of other family drama going on. The one SIL I'm close with was going to be out of town for the holiday with her family anyway. So I put my foot down and told my husband I refused to
    via roseypaige
  • 13
    spend the day with his mom and wanted to have Thanksgiving at home. with my family. He understood and my in- laws had friends they were hosting anyway. Then, at the last minute their plans fell through and they had no one to
    via roseypaige
  • 14
    spend Thanksgiving with. SO OF COURSE, I agreed to invite them to our Thanksgiving. This year, we had all been avoiding the Thanksgiving conversation, except my FIL who is relatively
    via roseypaige
  • 15
    oblivious to everything and would talk about it every time we saw him as if everything was going back to normal. So, in the spirit of trying to heal all the stuff from the past, I didn't argue and just waited for further instruction from my MIL.
    via roseypaige
  • 16
    A few weeks ago, she came to my house and basically politely uninvited us, stating that "it's just a lot of people this year". For context, it IS a lot of people - she had always invited my family over as well, which I appreciated. And if she's
    via roseypaige
  • 17
    telling me she feels it's too much for her, who am I to argue? Tbh I was relieved to not have to spend the day with her. Until I turned and looked at my daughter's face. And my husband's face when I told him. They were both extremely hurt
    via roseypaige
  • 18
    that they were being excluded. On the one hand, it was understandable why she had chosen us (we have a whole other family to celebrate with), but on the other hand, her other children and grandchildren were still
    via roseypaige
  • 19
    invited, so they definitely felt not great about it. To make it worse, she suggested that we do Thanksgiving at my mom's house (my mom was fine with it, but I thought it was a bit odd to go volunteering her to
    via roseypaige
  • 20
    host without even talking to her) and then EVERYONE (all the people that were too many people for my MIL) could meet at MY house for pie and a bonfire. Fine. My kids would be devastated if they didn't get to see
    via roseypaige
  • 21
    their cousins for Thanksgiving, so we'll make it work. I think I've been a really good sport. Even when she made it extra awkward by not telling ANYONE that she had uninvited us, including her own
    via roseypaige
  • 22
    husband, who awkwardly asked what the plans were and she just hushed him and told him "don't worry about it". Even when she lied to my 11 yo niece's face when she asked her if my kids would be there and she told her "of course, why
    via roseypaige
  • 23
    wouldn't they be?" (I literally had to turn to my 14yo who witnessed the initial conversation and ask if I had imagined it - she assured me I had not.) Fast forward to 2 days ago and my husband gets
    via roseypaige
  • 24
    a phone call from his mom, telling him that their plans fell through again and would we like to come after all? From a logistical standpoint, we've already planned our menu for my Mom's Thanksgiving and purchased the majority of
    via roseypaige
  • 25
    the food. From a moral standpoint...NO. Just no. Why would I want to go over there after all the frustration she put everyone through this year? And to top it off, it REALLY bothered me the
    via roseypaige
  • 26
    way she went about it - when she knew my husband might be upset, she came to me to uninvite us. When she knew I would be peeved to have to change plans again, she went to him. It just feels so manipulative and cowardly. I felt really
    via roseypaige
  • 27
    justified in putting my foot down and saying, "No, you made your bed, now lay in it." Except... Everyone is unhappy. My kids are unhappy. My nieces are unhappy. My husband is unhappy.
    via roseypaige
  • 28
    AITAH for wanting to just stick to the original plan to avoid my MIL as much as possible that day? I don't want my pride to ruin everyone else's Thanksgiving but I also REALLY don't want to spend it with her.
    via roseypaige
  • 29
    Extension-Plum... • 9h ago. NTA. Your MIL created this mess and now expects you to fix it? You've put up with her manipulative nonsense for years—she doesn't get to ruin your plans last minute.
    via Extension-Plum-180

Tags

family drama entitled parents holiday season thanksgiving mother wife reddit story family feud holiday husband entitled people karma mother in law entitled family Reddit holidays happy thanksgiving entitled people happy holidays
Scroll Down For The Next Article